| Ayy, man… man
|
| Ayy… Ayy
|
| I guess y’all on board
|
| Young Man couldn’t leave that shore
|
| Had the life they made for him till he seeked out more
|
| Boat rock, couldn’t see that storm, he’ll get up though
|
| He know he close, it’s too late to jump ship (Ayy)
|
| Aw, damn! |
| Aw, damn! |
| You that motherfucker shit
|
| I know,
|
| this here became a trip: Cabo
|
| Up in the womb, but you can feel it when I kick it, I know
|
| And you too must be rockin' with Lil Dicky: Bono
|
| It’s like I hit the lotto,
|
| I had to hit the wall though
|
| I couldn’t see it for a minute
|
| shit was hidden: Waldo
|
| They treat it like I’m goin' crazy, I’m just prayin', I don’t
|
| It’s just I know, it’s just I know
|
| I saw the world like, «Hold up»
|
| Damn near fakin' on the side
|
| Let me take you on a ride
|
| Let me tell you bout the one who couldn’t take the 9 to 5
|
| Use to take the 95 down to Richmond
|
| Bumpin' Jigga up in the ride
|
| Use to think along and drive
|
| 'Bout my drive
|
| Used to wonder why
|
| Used to wonder when the world’l see like I’m seein' mine
|
| Use to whine
|
| Use to wanna shine
|
| Used to wanna dine
|
| Used to talk to bitches in my mind when they were walkin' by
|
| «Girl, what’s happenin'? |
| Girl what’s happenin'?»
|
| I ain’t really 'bout to get involved that’s what’s happenin'
|
| Errything I knew was unevolved like a Baptist
|
| Layin' on my matress
|
| Prayin' I could have this, and
|
| Now when I get Tinder matches
|
| They think they’ve been Catfished
|
| Now I been controlling how we livin' like a facist
|
| Now I got this weight up off my shoulders like a strapless
|
| Remember this shit was hapless
|
| Remember the day it happened
|
| Aw, you the shit Dave, you be killin' everything you did
|
| Got the whole world talkin' all about what you did
|
| Got your old girl talkin' all about what you is
|
| Got your old world lookin' like it’s his you ain’t here
|
| I been fuckin' for the fuck of it
|
| And one of the bitches I been fuckin' with
|
| Been wondering how I can work this much and stomach it
|
| She wonders what I want from it
|
| I said, «We don’t gotta get into it»
|
| She like «Nah, just do it»
|
| She a psychology student
|
| She always followin' up
|
| Find the guy to be amusing as fuck
|
| Usually I’ll answer her truthfully
|
| But truthfully, I’m unusually used to being unusually good at internalizing
|
| when music is not provided
|
| But I humor hoe
|
| Ask her if she ever saw the Truman Show
|
| She like yeah
|
| I like well, when I saw that shit I was convinced I was livin' like Jim
|
| A similar situation where I was the basis of everyone’s entertainment
|
| Like really up in the basement talkin to y’all
|
| In the mirror because I thought Lil David was some American hero
|
| I know it’s selfish and all
|
| But I just felt it’s my call
|
| I was a ten year old then
|
| By 2010 I was wrong
|
| I’m like
|
| «Aw, damn! |
| Aw, damn!
|
| You the motherfucker though»
|
| I know
|
| That shit became a trip, Cabo
|
| Up in the womb, but you can feel it when I kick it, I know
|
| And you too must be rockin' with Lil Dicky, Bono
|
| It’s like I hit the lotto
|
| I had to hit the wall though
|
| I couldn’t see it for a minute
|
| Shit was hidden, Waldo
|
| They treat it like I’m goin' crazy
|
| I’m just playin', I don’t
|
| It’s just I know
|
| It’s just I know
|
| Twenty three bars up in my apartment
|
| I am debarred
|
| Gotta do this shit
|
| I gotta recharge
|
| But I gotta be smart
|
| Movin' up that ladder company
|
| Star, fuck it, that ain’t nothin'
|
| I am *the* star
|
| Spittin' like a retard
|
| Work was like a prison
|
| I’m just seein' bars
|
| My boss was all up in my camp
|
| And I’m just seein' Lars
|
| I been a heavyweight, Muhammad Ali
|
| And if he can mold that out of «Clay»
|
| Then I can turn the Lil D
|
| So now I’m snappin' like I’m Truman
|
| But off and on
|
| There’s always somethin' in the way
|
| I should be off and gone
|
| Girl I’m sorry if this draggin'
|
| I just need you to imagine
|
| Bein' stuck up on the land without a captain
|
| When everyday is average
|
| And everyday you feelin' like a captive
|
| And feel like somethin' seriously lackin'
|
| And then you fear what could happen if you just leave it on the table like
|
| napkins
|
| But, yo, you really fearin' hitting them rappin’s and leaving everything behind
|
| Cause you don’t know what that horizon brings
|
| But girl you gotta know what kind of fish you is |
| Survival instinct kicked in
|
| Sink or swim
|
| I flipped a playlist
|
| Quit my day gig
|
| Now, I’m on a boat, Lonely Island
|
| Irony, and you still been tryin' to figure how I work this tirelessly
|
| But girl
|
| This is everything I’ve thought
|
| This for everything I’ve fought
|
| This for who I am to me becomes to y’all
|
| (Go)
|
| They tellin' me «nah»
|
| But I just be tellin' them «yeah» (Go)
|
| I just be tellin' them «yeah» (Go)
|
| I just be tellin' them «yeah»
|
| Tell 'em I’m gone (Yeah)
|
| I just pretend I ain’t scared (Go)
|
| Don’t even know I was there (Go)
|
| Don’t even know if I care
|
| Cause girl this is Truman approachin' the wall
|
| Until I’m me I am nothin' at all
|
| Until I’m free I will not see beyond
|
| I had to be who I was all along
|
| Ay *crash*
|
| I think I mighta broke it down
|
| Hoppin' on the fuckin' steps like ain’t no around
|
| Open up that door, you bet, ship ain’t goin' down
|
| Guess the only thing left is to take a bow
|
| Aw, damn! |
| Aw, damn!
|
| You that motherfucker shit
|
| I know
|
| This ship became a trip, Cabo
|
| Up in the womb, but you can feel it when I kick it, I know
|
| And you too must be rockin' with Lil Dicky, Bono
|
| It’s like I hit the lotto
|
| I had to hit the wall though
|
| I couldn’t see it for a minute
|
| Shit was hidden, Waldo
|
| They treat it like I’m goin' crazy
|
| I’m just prayin', I don’t
|
| It’s just I know
|
| It’s just I know
|
| Fuck!
|
| That felt good
|
| Well, that’s all I got
|
| The show is over, as they say
|
| Honestly, I just think that part in the Truman Show where his boat hits the
|
| wall is really the exact
|
| Moment that I’m at in my own life right now
|
| Uh… metaphorically, of course
|
| And I’m ready for — I think I’m ready for it
|
| Like I’ve been thinkin' about it, I think I’m ready
|
| I mean, if I’m being completely transparent with y’all
|
| Uh, like my lifestyle hasn’t really changed that much
|
| Uh, you know, considering, uh, where I think I’m at musically
|
| Like I’m still at the point right now where pretty much any bitch that tweets
|
| at me anything remotely flirtatious
|
| I have seen not just one of your pictures, I have seen the entire catalog
|
| That’s the type of shit that’s goin' down over here right now, so…
|
| I am definitely ready for that, uh, next step, y’know what I’m sayin'?
|
| I think it’s close, too
|
| I think it’s close
|
| Like, uh, Diddy tweeted about me
|
| Uh, y’know, that… I don’t know if he handles his own Twitter
|
| I would assume he probably doesn’t, actually
|
| But, like, I’m so confident that I feel as though, like, me and Diddy will have
|
| a moment just about this outro
|
| Like when we’re both sittin' next to each other smokin' cigars
|
| And bein' like, «Ay, remember when you said that shit on that outro?»
|
| Like, and I’m like, «Yeah. |
| That’s, this is the exact moment I — I did that for,
|
| y’know what I’m sayin'?»
|
| Bring the — bring the beat back up. |
| I don’t know why
|
| Like, keep, loop everything. |
| I wanna be talkin' for minutes, yeah, uh,
|
| y’know what I’m sayin'?
|
| Like, uh, shout out my Macbook Pro
|
| Had that shit since '09
|
| I made my first song ever on it
|
| Like, when I called myself Lil Dicky
|
| I made my, like, fuckin' album song on that shit
|
| And we survived, baby
|
| Uh, shoutout Allen Iverson, Larry David, Will Smith, and Kobe Bryant
|
| For makin' me the man that I am today
|
| Both on and off the court
|
| Shout out my mother
|
| What a great woman
|
| She’s so mad I recorded these conversations
|
| She — she honestly went crazy
|
| It took so much convincing to allow this
|
| But, she’s awesome
|
| She’s adapting to the rap game, as we all are
|
| Look, I just want to get this to a place where I can sell TMZ pictures of my
|
| actual asshole
|
| Heh, y’know?
|
| Cause, well, I, I think that’d be such a feat
|
| If I could actually create, like, an alt alias
|
| And sell TMZ pictures of my own asshole
|
| Like, profit off of that
|
| That, I would totally do it
|
| I don’t know why Seth Rogen’s not already doing it
|
| I don’t, I’m seein' the signs that it’s not, I’m
|
| I think I’m seein' the signs
|
| I hope I am
|
| If I’m really just misreading all these signs
|
| Then, I am 100% gonna have, like, a legitimate nervous breakdown
|
| Uh, at some point very soon
|
| So, we’ll find out about that
|
| But I see some signs
|
| Like, like I really am not fuckin' that much |
| But, like, the other day I did fuck a bitch to music
|
| Like, I fucked a bitch to some Miguel
|
| And that’s kind of new for me if I’m bein' real
|
| Like, I had never actually done it before
|
| But I was feelin' like I was some king shit
|
| Y’know what I’m sayin'?
|
| So, I was like, «Man, Imma fuck this bitch to some Miguel right now»
|
| Uh, actually to be completely real to you, I, I will never fuck a girl to music
|
| again
|
| I found the whole thing to feel, like, completely cliche
|
| Like, I don’t need my emotions dictated to me by, like, music
|
| It makes me feel like I’m in a TV scene
|
| Takes all the, like, realness out of the moment for me
|
| Like, actually, was actually super weirded out by it
|
| So, but still, like, I am about to let my hair down
|
| And, I don’t know, I just feel like it’s all comin'
|
| I feel like, like, I’m literally, like, about to find out about everything
|
| And it’s exciting
|
| And, I, y’know, I, I had pinkeye last week
|
| And I remember thinkin' that, as I, like, was like, real down
|
| Cause I was, like, trying to keep recording and shit
|
| But I was thinking, «What would Michael Jordan do?»
|
| And he would play through the pinkeye
|
| So that’s why I’m in here
|
| I’m still not fully recovered, y’know what I’m sayin'?
|
| I, I’m definitely clearin' up
|
| Like, it’s totally on the upswing
|
| But, I just want you know I did record this shit through pinkeye
|
| Alright, I could talk for fuckin' years
|
| Legitimate years
|
| This is an outro to an out
|
| You see how long I talk with outros to songs
|
| But, goddamn
|
| Look, I need to get out of here
|
| I’m 'bout to go take a Khalifa
|
| Rest up
|
| That’s right, I did invent that phrase just there
|
| «Take a Khalifa»
|
| Y’know what I’m sayin'?
|
| I also invented «That's what she said»
|
| But I get no credit for it
|
| Uh, oh, shoutout to Dickheads, obviously
|
| Fundin' this whole operation
|
| Whatchu know about a Kickstarter, man?
|
| Whatchu know about the best fans in the world?
|
| Seriously
|
| Thank you guys, I appreciate it
|
| Honestly, you made my dreams come true, and that’s fact
|
| Couldn’t have done this without y’all
|
| Uh, I’d like to shout out my dick
|
| I know, y’know,
|
| we haven’t had the smoothest relationship
|
| But, I feel as though by kind of putting our issues out there
|
| Like, we have become something bigger than we could have been otherwise
|
| And, hopefully soon you will be rewarded for your patience
|
| And I will be rewarded for my patience
|
| I, and, I respect you
|
| I’d like to shout out my brain
|
| My brain got the hardest verse on the whole goddamn album
|
| I hope my brain starts gettin' some feature looks
|
| But he don’t just hop on shit
|
| Fuck, I, I got nothin' left
|
| I’m out
|
| I’m a professional rapper
|
| Long live LD
|
| And in case I don’t see ya
|
| «Good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.» |