| I have this new tattoo of which the story must be told
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| About the night I almost overdosed ten years ago
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| I woke up in the hospital with skin clammy and cold
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| And tubes in my urethra, down my throat, and up my nose
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| My friends and the doctors were all shocked I wasn’t dead
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| That’s when Katrina looked at me and this is what she said
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| So I walked to the rebel spot, I walked all over uptown
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| I walked right side up and I walked upside down
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| I walked to Chetzemoka with my eyes fixed on the ground yeah
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| We walked all over Chetze Beach and kept the rocks we found
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| Then I walked back to my parents' house, I walked back to my old bed yeah
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| I walked back and I walked fast past all the voices in my head
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| I walked with the sweats and I walked with the chills
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| I walked in New York City and I walked in Bedford Hills
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| I walked into open mic nights and I walked into the rooms
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| I walked feeling optimistic and I walked feeling doomed
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| I walked with some mama’s boys and I walked with some punks
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| I walked dressed up like a rabbit, I walked dressed up like a skunk
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| I walked with some givers and I walked with some leeches
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| I walked all by myself and I walked with the Moldy Peaches
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| I walked all over the world so I could sing my songs to you
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| And to your most desperate emails I said, «This is what I do.»
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| I Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| But at some point I got so comfortable
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| That I didn’t even realize that I’d started to crawl
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| That my old friend Ammi died at 37 of a heart attack
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| And I cracked cause people my age are not supposed to die like that
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| No no no no people my age are not supposed to die like that
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| He was the old manager of the sidewalk café
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| That place was a second home to me, it’s where I learned to play
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| And his personality really helped create a space
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| Where a bunch of honest misfits could all gather and feel safe
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| He was a cynic, a supporter, he was crazy, he was queer
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| He’d either yell out, «Cut the bullshit» or he’d say, «I'm glad you’re here.»
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| And it was always such an honour to have Ammi on my side
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| That’s why it hit me like a Mack truck when I found out that he died
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| Yeah, it hit me like a Mack trucks when I found that he died
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| Then enter Alex, 33 years old and so sick with the cancer
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| And trapped inside a body that betrayed his real gender
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| We all hoped and prayed that he would go into remission
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| At least long enough, just long enough to complete his transition
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| He said, «Kimya, did you know Eleventeen’s my favourite song?»
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| I said, «Then get your ass on stage right now and you can sing along.»
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| That’s the very first song I ever wrote all by myself
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| It’s about angels and recovery and friends and hope and health
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| By the time we finished singing he was pissed off, he was scared
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| He said, «I lost my home, my lover, my insurance, and my hair.
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| And now I’m about to lose you too, my new friend.»
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| I looked into those big blue eyes and said we’ll meet again
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| Yeah I looked into his sad blue eyes and said we’ll meet again
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| Then I got the phone call from Alyssa and she told me he was dying
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| By the time I got to his bedside we were both already flying
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| We held hands and we sang songs, tried to be strong floated around
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| While I cursed the skin that he was in for all the ways it had let him down
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| Yeah I cursed the skin that he was in for all the ways it had let him down
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| But at the same time I was taking my own body for granted
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| First I lost sight of my feet then they became unplanted
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| And I never felt so stupid or so selfish or so sad yeah
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| I body had been good to me and I treated it so bad yeah
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| My body had been good to me and I treated it so bad
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| Then he said, «Mama, I don’t want my friends to watch me die.»
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| So I kissed his cheek, made him a shirt, and then I said goodbye
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| And they cremated him in the shirt that I drew
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| Of the two of us that said they’re flying over you too
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| Now the silver pink ponies have my homie in their crew
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| So I tightened up my laces and knew what I had to do
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| I started walking again, I started walking again |
| I miss my friends
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| I started walking again, I started walking again
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| I miss my friends
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Walk like thunder
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| Even creeps as a habit predisposed
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| To systematically clinging together in the cold
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| Know the measure of a pack, it’s not a question of the whole
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| The individuals that bottleneck into the fold
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| On a March black Sabbath, news from the ministry of make-believe that reach a
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| tarmac in Minneapolis
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| Middle C, yesterday the cells inside his chest were growing baby teeth
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| Today a raven radiated vacancy
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| Wait, two years ago a friend of mine called me to redefine all enemy-kind
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| I’m at the hospital at twenty-four and no one knew the future
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| I’ll take it everybody knows the future
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| Antibodies hatching in a helaback with no room to maneuver
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| Like disappearing pills into the masticated fuchsia
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| I asked you how you feeling, you told me like a robot
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| I gave you a Nintendo, you gave yourself a Mohawk
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| You let us wheel you down beneath the leaning tower of flow charts
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| To be around your beats without a beeping sound of Bogart
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| And speak about whatever people speak about
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| When nobody’s acknowledging the obvious disease about to crowbar in
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| Deplane slow, comatose of baggage
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| From King of Hearts to carrying for jackals
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| And never got to sing us all his own swan song right
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| Coincidentally the rebel in me warped like thunder
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| Walk like thunder |