| My third shot down, I’m in trouble
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| I’m a newly single man, seein' double
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| Fake a smile for all my friends
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| Then go home alone around 2 AM
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| And stumble through the front door, gone as it gets
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| Flip the kitchen light on, there it is
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| On the fridge, just my luck
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| «Read this if you’re drunk»
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| Don’t think about it, mister
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| Don’t even touch your phone
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| I know you think you miss her
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| But I promise you, you don’t
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| There’s healing in the lonely
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| Sit back, kick off your boots
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| And you’ll thank me in the morning
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| Like you always do
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| Signed, sober you
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| P. S., there’s pizza in the freezer, Dumb and Dumber on the TV
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| It’s so stupid, that’s what you’d be
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| To go diggin' through her Instagram
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| If you’re thinkin' 'bout that, read this again
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| Don’t think about it, mister
|
| Don’t even touch your phone
|
| I know you think you miss her
|
| But I promise you, you don’t
|
| There’s healing in the lonely
|
| Sit back, kick off your boots
|
| And you’ll thank me in the morning
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| Like you always do
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| Signed, sober you
|
| Signed, sober you
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| Yeah, well remember last time that you hit her up
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| You heard some other guy, how much does that suck?
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| That set you back a month, yeah, trust me, old friend
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| You don’t wanna go down that road again
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| Don’t think about it, mister
|
| Don’t even touch your phone
|
| I know you wanna kiss her
|
| But I promise you, you don’t
|
| And there’s healing in the lonely
|
| Sit back, kick off your boots
|
| And you’ll thank me in the morning
|
| Like you always do
|
| Signed, sober you, yeah, yeah
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| Signed, sober you |