| God is a middle-aged woman
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| With planets for earrings and international date lines
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| At the corners of her eyes
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| She’s thinkin' 'bout remarriage
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| To a guy she recently met
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| And hasn’t even asked out on a date
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| Okay, to be perfectly honest
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| He’s never even spoken to her
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| He barely even knows she exists
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| But hey, God is really shy
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| She doesn’t like confrontations
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| And she’s not so young anymore
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| But oh, God, won’t you just say hello?
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| Oh, God, you can take it real slow
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| It’s been hard since Jeremy left her
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| Sometimes it seems so pointless
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| Like she’s unloveable
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| But I, I love her very much
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| I love the way she looks
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| And I just want her to be happy
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| I wish I could talk some sense
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| Into her troubled head
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| Full of beautiful grey hairs
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| But I, I am only human
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| But maybe that’s just it
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| Maybe that’s just what she needs
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| Oh, God, things are gonna be fine
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| Oh, God, don’t lose your head over some stupid guy
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| Ah, so beautiful on the patio at night
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| Ah, so wonderful, how did I not see it before?
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| Oh God
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| Oh God
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| Oh God
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| Oh God |