| I was sitting in my basement I just rolled myself a taste
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| Of something green and gold and glorious to get me through the day
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| Then my friend yelled through the transom Grab your coat and get your hat son
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| There’s a nut down on the corner, givin' dollar bills away
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| But I laid around a bit
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| Then I had another hit
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| Then I rolled myself a bauma
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| Then I thought about my mama
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| Then I fooled around, played around
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| Jacked around a while and then
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| I got stoned and I missed it
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| I got stoned and I missed it
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| I got stoned and it rolled right by
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| I got stoned and I missed it
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| I got stoned and I missed it
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| I got stoned oh me oh my
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| Now it took seven months of urging just to get that local virgin
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| With the sweet face up to my place to fool around a bit
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| Next day she woke up rosy and she snuggled up so cosy
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| When she asked me how I liked it Lord it hurt me to admit
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned and it rolled right by
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned oh me oh my
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| Now I ain’t makin' no excuses for the many things I uses
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| Just to sweeten my relationships and brighten up my day
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| But when my earthly race is over and I’m ready for the clover
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| And they ask me how my life has been I guess I’ll have to say
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned and it rolled right by
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned and I missed it
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| I was stoned oh me oh my |