| I’m tired man…
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| Sometimes I just sit in my room and hold my breath
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| And let all the pressure and anxiety build up
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| And just let the time pass by
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| At first, I couldn’t breathe
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| Now I’m suffocating
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| Maybe the pressure from the fame isn’t worth what I’m chasing
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| I used to say God’s playing, now the devil’s on my team acting foul and it’s
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| all flagrant
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| Tryna push me off the path that I’m steady paving
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| Sin is the currency and every day I’m making payments
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| I don’t wanna live in it but I heard a saying
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| «Good knows evil cause the houses are both adjacent»
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| I don’t know if I should go for these goals
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| I’ve seen people gain the world but lose their souls
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| My anxiety is building as the weight of it grows
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| I succumb myself in privacy inside my home
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| And I barely answer calls and when I see my phone
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| I’m reminded that the real feeling of being alone is having millions who love
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| you but can leave you or say that they hate you at the moment they don’t fuck
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| with a song
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| I used to laugh it off
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| Now I hold my breath and suffocate
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| Then I sit and wait just to see if I can kill the hate
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| And as I’m fleeting I see God at the heaven’s gates
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| Then come back down to fight another day
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| Then I grab that same phone and smile and wave
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| And pour my empty heart into a song that they won’t praise
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| They say patience is the key but they didn’t tell me, while I wait I’ll be
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| locked inside a steel cage
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| Something’s wrong, I feel claustrophobic
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| I’m stuck living in the past and not the moment
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| Or the future where my life is only more broken
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| Cause those wounds from the past are still open
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| I take sips of love and every single time it’s poison I see
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| Women who can’t see past my employment
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| Or see me as enjoyment so I can’t enjoy it cause the ride’s temporary and they
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| leave once they crash and destroy it
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| I don’t think this life is healthy, why didn’t anybody tell me?
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| Everybody want help but nobody wanna help me
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| I’m an ATM, a therapist and everybody’s friendly
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| And they hide their real intentions but my mind won’t let me
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| If I make a sad song, don’t ask me if I’m happy
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| Fuck a hook, my pain isn’t catchy
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| If you relate, or worse feel badly, fucking pity me at least and check in if
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| you at me
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| That’s the only way I’ll know who it touches
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| That’s why I stay awake and answer DMs by the hundreds
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| So I don’t lose myself and fill my stomach with the feeling that I’m here just
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| to suffocate for nothing
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| If you know real pain then you see it when you look me in my eyes
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| I try to hide it but they do not lie
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| I wanna sleep but if I try, the demons who creep in my dreams will collide
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| So I stay up and I stare at the ceiling
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| And ask myself if I should even share these feelings
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| Then I hear a voice in the distance from a ghost-like image
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| Saying my pain could be somebody’s healing
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| So I close my eyes and drift to the place that inspires these lyrics
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| And as I see flames and I scream, I pray it’s a place you’ll never have to visit |