| The girls today in society go for classical poetry
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| So to win their hearts one must quote with ease
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| Aeschylus and Euripides
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| But the poet of them all
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| Who will start 'em simply ravin'
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| Is the poet people call
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| The Bard of Stratford on Avon
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| Brush up your Shakespeare
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| Start quoting him now
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| Brush up your Shakespeare
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| And the women you will wow
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| Just declaim a few lines from Othella
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| And they’ll think you’re a hell of a fella
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| If your blond won’t respond when you flatter 'er
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| Tell her what Tony told Cleopatterer
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| If she fights when her clothes you are mussing
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| What are clothes? |
| Much ado about nussing
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| Brush up your Shakespeare
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| And they’ll all kow-tow
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| With the wife of the British ambessida
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| Try a crack out of Troilus and Cressida
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| If she says she won’t buy it or tike it
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| Make her tike it, what’s more 'As You Like It'
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| If she says your behavior is heinous
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| Kick her right in the Coriolanus
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| Brush up your Shakespeare
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| And they’ll all kow-tow, thinkst thou?
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| And they’ll all kow-tow, odds Bodkins
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| All kow-tow |