Lyrics Hump Day - Chris Webby

Hump Day

Yeah
You know, some of the motherfuckers out here acting like I don’t still got bars
Like this isn’t exactly what the fuck I do!
Heh… stupid motherfuckers, yeah
My DNA litty, frame skinny and brain witty
With weed in my jeans, my mom’s a straight hippie
Keep a tight circle of those that bring with me
Rocking Timberland boots and we bang Biggie
You dig me?
Pulling up while puffing the sticky
With a bird, like I got some Snuffleupagus in me
Getting faded every single time I come to your city
I’ll be up at the local bar like Always Sunny in Philly
Keep it a hundred and fifty
No lil dicky, bitch I’m medium sized
Doing whatever is needed for my piece of the pie
Jacked up on so many damn amphetamines that I believe I can fly
Brain and Pinky with the scheme I devised
Diso-bidient mind, making G’s on the grind
Webby make your head nod, put your seat in recline
With that throwback steeze
Like somebody learned to freeze it in time
Prince of Persia with the meanest of rhymes
(An emcee in his prime, you feel me?)
What you see though?
The great Bambino
Knock it out the park with unadulterated primo
Marlo Stanfield got that work for the fiends
And I’m rackin' up streams, makin' Spotify see notes
My fam is so Italian my uncle was Vito, Corleone
Shit you could ask my cousin Pacino, I Pesci up casino
We toast a cup of the vino
Cuz see us skinnies go back like Barney Rubble and Dino
(yeah I mean yo, yo)
You don’t really wanna see these lyrics in action
They only talk about me quiet cuz they fear my reaction
And on the mic, actual fire appears when I’m rappin'
It’s no coincidence I was born in the year of the dragon
1988 see, I’m a veteran millennial
With ADHD, and the heaviest of medical
Respect me as the general or I’m crackin' your skeletal
Then smash your ventricles with the force of the Kraken’s tentacles
(I hope you’re flexible)
Been doubted by every board and panel
And record executive taste-maker and blog writer who saw my channel
So now I put 'em on blast, I’m on that Stormy Daniels Roman candle
I’m that firecracker flyin' off the handle
Tony Soprano, boss of the bosses
Climbin' up that ladder 'til I got the corner office
Stackin' orders, fatten wallets
Take my piece and then I give a chunk to some environmental causes
(And save the dolphins)
They think I’m illustrated rockin' a tank top
Tats lookin' like I’m gettin' sponsored by Gamestop
Super Mario, I keep that fireball flame hot
Sewer drain hop from Peach Castle to Bangkok
(Let the bass knock)
It’s too grimy to fight it
Got 'em sweatin' from the second that my fire’s ignited
And I’ll still be showin' up even if I ain’t invited
Shit you gon' have to drag me out like I was flyin' United
(Get the fuck off me!)
'Cause I’m that legend of the hidden temple
I spit it mental on an instrumental
Do it for the culture, fuck if imma win a medal
That or get a grammy, imma never find that shit essential
I’m just here to watch these rappers sweatin' when I grip a pencil
I’m influential as I’m servin' rap caviar, you know
Havin' bars, spittin' flows, fuckin' rappin' hard
And Lil Xan looks like a lesbian muppet
But since I’m cuttin' back on drugs imma only give him half a bar
(2Pac is not boring!)
XXL just keeps makin' lists
Whether freshmen or otherwise, I ain’t been on shit
I been waitin' for a lot of years to say this, so here we go, uh
Double XL, suck my dick
God damn that felt good, I just had to mention it
I know that written print is in decline, they ain’t sellin' shit
And now they’re barely graspin' onto any shred of relevance
But, their fall from grace is somethin' I would love to help 'em with
(This shit is effortless)
I never let 'em take my passion from me
Even here and now when finally I’m stackin' money
'Cause it’s still the same Webby, I ain’t actin' funny
I’m still out here writin' chapters in how to rap for dummies
'Cause I’m back to talk shit about the whole damn globe, bitch
Put 'em in the Conan choke grip
If you can’t see that I’m the truth then imma change y’all focus
It’s Wednesday, so put the whole game on notice, bitch
Yeah, I’m back
If I don’t get 'em this week, or the week after that
Or the week after that one, I promise you
One of these motherfuckin' Wednesdays, they gon' learn
They gon' learn!