| Well, I had myself a girlfrield
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| For almost two whole years
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| We had no secrets
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| We had no fears
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| There was nothing we wouldn’t do When we were in the sack
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| She’d even pop the zit on my back
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| But one night I was out cheating
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| After I drank a few
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| She caught me red handed
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| And said we’re through
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| Now she’s got a new boyfriend
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| It nearly gave me a heart attack
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| 'Cuz who’s gonna pop this zit on my back?
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| Well I got a pimple and I don’t know why
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| It keeps growing in the same place
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| I can’t reach it with my left or right hand
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| I wish it was on my face
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| It’s four days old
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| And it hurts so bad
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| But it’s ready for a squeeze
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| Won’t somebody pop it for me please?
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| I’ll give you ten dollars
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| If you’re a girl in this lonely world
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| And you’re looking for a guy
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| I’ll never cheat again, I promise
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| That’s no lie
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| There’s only one thing I ask of you
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| Could we name our first child Zak?
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| Oh, one more thing
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| Please pop this zit on my back
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| I’m dying here!
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| A pimple ay-hee
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| A pop-a-doodly-doo
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| Squirt heedly-hoo
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| Well I’m sitting alone by the phone
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| And no one seems to call
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| I try to scrape my zit off on the kitchen wall
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| Well that don’t work, so I look around
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| And find a big shiny thumb-tack
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| Put it on the floor, lay down
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| Pop the zit on my back |