| hi it’s great to be back with you
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| i am feeling well
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| mind if i just sing
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| i’ll start upon hearing the bell
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| mummy’s baking birthday bread
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| and daddy’s drink destroys his head
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| and little distant cousin’s asleep
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| but i’m a cool daddio
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| bubba’s busy masturbating
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| sissy’s sewing sweaters
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| so her fine fiance fits in the sheep
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| but i’m a cool daddio
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| you should see my fancy outfit
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| you should see their eyes
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| mummy’s polishing pottery
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| and daddy wins the lottery
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| and grandma’s little nephew’s in bed
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| but i’m a cool daddio
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| bubba’s boring barbara
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| and sissy’s in the shower
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| shaving stubbles like her fiance said
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| cool daddio, that’s me
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| i’m so debonair
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| but i don’t care to stick around
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| so i’m gettin' outta here
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| mummy begs for me to stay
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| and daddy says to go away
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| and little distant cousin woke up
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| yet i’m a cool daddio
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| everyone just settle down
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| and listen to my song
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| bubba’s breaking bureau shelves
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| and sissy is proud of herself
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| because her fiance is choked up
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| cool daddio, i’m just a… |