| Soon as you like, ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats
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| In a moment there’ll be a test of your endurance
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| Stay in your chairs in the event of a dramatic pause
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| Please be aware nothing gets covered by insurance
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| One final thing:
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| Please take the trouble to read through your notes
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| It’s important that you know where you’ve got to go to
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| Wait a moment, maybe the usherette’ll show you
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| Such excitement, these are the hoops you’ve got to go through…
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| The noises off that turn you on stage whispered from the wings
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| A stifled cough, a joke that bombs, a smoldering fuse wire string
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| When Mr. Sands is in the house the alarm bells start to ring
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| Everything’s in code
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| In a world we barely know
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| And the truth is only slowly revealed…
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| With best intentions I have strayed far off the beaten track
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| And of attention I displayed a quite spectacular lack
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| Now Mr. Sands is in the house and the panic button’s smacked
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| Well, Mr. Sands is in the house: commotion in the stalls
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| And, from the gods, unruly shouts that echo round the hall
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| Yes, someone’s let the secret out… the safety curtain falls
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| And as I look across the stage the thought that first occurs
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| Is less that we have come of age and more that we’re preserved
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| To pass our time in different shades of ignorant reserve
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| Everything’s in code
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| Till the moment it explodes
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| We suspend belief, get ready to go
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| For the playout of the show —
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| Here it is for all we know
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| Mr Sands is always ready to roll |