| If I had wings
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| I wouldn’t do anything beautiful and transcendent
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| No
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| I’d get my finger into everything I wanted
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| I’d do all the beautiful things
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| Those things you can’t do
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| Because nobody wants you to be able to do
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| The things that make you feel good
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| Like you can’t smoke on the airplane
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| I remember smoking on the airplane
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| I used to love to smoke on the airplane
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| Those were the golden days of air travel
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| They would just open the door at the airport
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| And you’d walk right out the tarmac
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| And up those stairs and light a big cigarette
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| And stick it in the ashtray
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| And the stewardess would come along
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| And if she was hot, you can try to pick her up
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| Once I was flying
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| From New York to DC
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| I didn’t have much time
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| And the stewardess was smoking
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| She was a dusky tall
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| American beauty
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| And I put down my tray table
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| Snorted a gram of cocaine
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| Till I got up my courage to say
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| «Can I have your phone number?»
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| And she gave me the number
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| That was the good news
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| The bad news was I got too stoned and I’d lost the number
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| The stewardess would’ve been better than the cocaine
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| I made an error in judgement
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| But still I remember smoking on the airplane
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| Smoking on the airplane
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| Smoking on the airplane, everybody did it
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| They’d gather at the back on the way to Australia
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| And all puff up at once outside the bathroom
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| And that’s why if I had wings
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| That would be a bad idea, hahahahaha, I guess
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| According to everything I’ve been taught about the laws of
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| Ethics and karma and good behavior, hahahahaha
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| If I had wings, I’d go, yum, yum, yum-yum, yum-yum, yum, ow!
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| I’d have fun
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| If I had wings, I’d have fun
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| Smoking on the airplane
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| (You can’t do that)
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| (You can’t do that)
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| (You can’t do that)
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| (You can’t do that)
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| Teenage boys used to hijack the airplane and send it to Cuba
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| Castro would charge 20 grand
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| The airline would get your airplane back
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| He had a good business (You can’t do that, you can’t do that)
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| It’s over (You can’t do that, you can’t do that)
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| It’s over for the liberal democracies (You can’t do that)
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| It’s over (You can’t do that)
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| Here comes the jungle (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight on my wings (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight on my wings (You can’t do that)
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| No more rock critics (You can’t do that, you can’t do that)
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| No more (You can’t do that)
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| European ideas of (You can’t do that)
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| Good and bad (You can’t do that)
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| Only a vengeful (You can’t do that)
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| God does not allow smoking on the airplane
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| (You can’t do that, you can’t do that)
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| (You can’t do that) There will be no revolution (You can’t do that)
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| And that’s why (You can’t do that)
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| It won’t be televised (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight on my wings
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| Sunlight (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight (You can’t do that)
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| Sunlight (You can’t do that)
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| If I had wings… |