| My dog’s bigger than your dog,
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| My dog’s bigger than yours,
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| My dog’s bigger
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| And he chases mailmen,
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| My dog’s bigger than yours,
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| My dog’s better than your dog,
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| My dog’s better than yours,
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| His name is King,
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| And he had puppies,
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| My dog’s better than yours.
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| My dad’s tougher than your dad,
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| My dad’s tougher than yours,
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| My dad’s tougher
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| And he yells louder and
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| My dad’s tougher than yours.
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| My dad’s louder than your dad,
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| My dad’s louder than yours,
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| Momma buys a new dress,
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| Daddy makes noises,
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| My dad’s louder than yours.
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| Our car’s faster than your car,
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| Our car’s faster than yours,
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| It has a louder horn,
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| It bumps other cars,
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| Our car’s faster than yours.
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| Our car’s older than your car,
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| Our car’s older than yours,
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| It stops running and Daddy kicks the fenders,
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| Our car’s older than yours.
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| My Mom’s older than your Mom,
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| My Mom’s older than yours,
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| She takes smelly baths
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| She hides the gray hairs
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| My Mom’s older than yours.
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| My Mom’s funnier than your Mom,
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| My Mom’s funnier than yours,
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| Her hair is pretty and
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| It changes colors,
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| My Mom’s funnier than yours. |