| Don’t wanna be in your club if you’d take me as a member
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| I’m not even slightly interested in whether I’m remembered
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| I say ashes to ashes, dust to dust
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| Gimme a tombstone if you feel you must
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| Saying «Here lies a clown who wrote some songs
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| He talked too much and stayed too long»
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| Back home in Perth I played piano down at Café Piazza
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| Swallowing second-hand smoke and singing standards by the masters
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| Learned that every lyric’s sacred
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| That love’s everything
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| And that three drinks make you straighten up
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| And four get you swingin'
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| 'Til my crowds scared the suits away and I’d play my own songs
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| And then we’d talk too much and stay too long
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| (Talk too much and stay too long)
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| Moved to Melbourne with my missus after locking her down
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| Felt like a very little fishy in a very big town
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| Barely scraping by on corporate gigs and quaint cabaret
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| Playing keyboards in a cover band until three in the AM
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| I was never really suited to them top 40 songs
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| Cause I talked too much and played too long
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| Ha!
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| Don’t wanna be in your club if you’d take me as a member
|
| I’m not even slightly interested in whether I’m remembered
|
| I say ashes to ashes, dust to dust
|
| Gimme a tombstone if you feel you must
|
| Saying «Here lies a clown who wrote some songs
|
| He talked too much and stayed too long»
|
| Took my eyeliner to Edinburgh in twenty-oh-five (2005)
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| Played to 45 paying punters on the opening night
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| But to my surprise there was a rising demand
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| For a lovechild of Liberace and Edward Scissorhands
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| Dude from the papers said that digging me was wrong
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| He said I talked too much and stayed too long
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| I’ve played the Albert Hall and Wembley, I’ve played basements and bars
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| I’ve been to Hollywood and Broadway, met those A-lister stars
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| I’ve shared cigarettes with knights, shot tequila with dames
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| Found I’m more interested in laughter than in hotness and fame
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| So long as you got irony honey we’ll get along
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| We can talk too much and stay way, way too long
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| Don’t wanna be in your club if you’d take me as a member
|
| I’m not even slightly interested in whether I’m remembered
|
| I say ashes to ashes, dust to dust
|
| Gimme a tombstone if you feel you must
|
| Saying «Here lies a clown who wrote some songs
|
| He talked too much and stayed too long»
|
| You know he talked too much and stayed too long
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| You know he talked too much and stayed too long
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| I’ve been threatened with death and arrested and hell
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| I went hard at a cardinal who was feeling unwell
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| I’ve had them dogwhistling whiners send their dogs after me
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| I’ve been a bigot and a faggot, I’ve been smug and ugly
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| I’m a long-haired lefty joker and a smoker of bongs
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| And I talked too much and stayed too long
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| But fuck that «live fast die young» shit, I plan on getting rickety
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| Baby I intend to stick around til' all you pricks are sick of me
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| And when they come to wash my old man balls and feed me mashed banana
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| They’ll find me in the common room playing blues on the piano
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| Same old three chords and cliched fuckin' runs
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| And I’ll talk too much and stay too long
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| And I’ll talk too much
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| Don’t wanna be in your club if you’d take me as a member
|
| I’m not even slightly interested in whether I’m remembered
|
| I say ashes to ashes, dust to dust
|
| Gimme a tombstone if you feel you must
|
| Saying «Here lies a clown who wrote some songs
|
| He talked too much and stayed too long»
|
| You know he talked too much and stayed too long
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| You know he talked too much and stayed too long
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| Another white motherfucker rambling on
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| He talked too much and stayed too long |