| What were the first things you remember you did
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| And then what were the worst things
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| Cos you got the purse strings to what you’ll admit
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| I wanna know what were those worst things
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| Is it hard
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| Is it hard to confess
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| He’s got the most interesting dance steps
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| Of anyone I’ve ever met
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| Makes promises he never kept
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| Got nothing but his self respect
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| Has a smile that would melt your face
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| The professional disturber of the peace
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| Well he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats
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| Yeah he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats
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| Pisses in your petrol tank unrequested expects no thanks
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| So were the first things you remember you did
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| And then what were the worst things
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| Cos you got the purse strings to what you’ll admit
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| I wanna know what were those worst things
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| Is it hard
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| Is it hard to confess
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| He’s got a house out in shitland
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| Gets wordy in his own slang
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| Got a body full of heat and hate the sicker mind appreciates
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| Has a smile that would melt your face
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| The professional disturber of the peace
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| Well he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats
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| Yeah he lies he drinks he smokes he sweats
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| Passes every chance he gets never covers losing bets
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| Thanks |