| Don’t ask me why, don’t ask me why
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| I joined the army, The Salvation Army
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| But it didn’t help
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| Don’t ask me why, don’t ask me why
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| I joined the army, but it drove me barmy
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| And it didn’t help
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| Hideous towns make me throw up
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| Don’t ask me why, don’t ask me why
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| I went into service with The Civil Service
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| But it didn’t help
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| Don’t ask me why, don’t ask me why
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| I went into service, but it made me nervous
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| And it didn’t help
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| Ooh, hideous towns made me throw up
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| And sticks and stones may break my bones
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| But words will just finish me off
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| Yeah, near enough
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| Oh oh, my hopeless youth it’s so uncouth
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| And oh, I’d like to be in history
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| I said, oh in my hopeless youth just so uncouth
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| So there you go and now you know
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| But just please don’t
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| Don’t ask me why, don’t ask me why
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| I went to the circus, Piccadilly Circus
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| It was very strange
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| Don’t ask me why, cos I don’t know why
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| Never one to roam, I took the first bus home
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| And I haven’t changed
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| Ooh, hideous towns made me throw up
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| And I know sticks and stones may break my bones
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| But words will just finish me off
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| Yeah, near enough
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| Yes they do
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| Said, oh my hopeless youth it’s so uncouth
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| Said, oh and I’d like to be in history
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| Said, oh in my hopeless youth it’s just so uncouth
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| So there you go, and now you know
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| But just please don’t…
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| Please, please, please
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| Said oh, yeah my hopeless youth just so damn, oh oh
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| Yeah, my hopeless youth is really very young
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| Just really very young |