| We skipped the light fandango
 | 
| Turned cartwheels 'cross the floor
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| I was feeling kinda seasick
 | 
| But the crowd called out for more
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| The room was humming harder
 | 
| As the ceiling flew away
 | 
| When we called out for another drink
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| The waiter brought a tray
 | 
| And so it was that later
 | 
| As the miller told his tale
 | 
| That her face, at first just ghostly
 | 
| Turned a whiter shade of pale
 | 
| She said, 'There is no reason
 | 
| And the truth is plain to see.'
 | 
| But I wandered through my playing cards
 | 
| And would not let her be
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| One of sixteen vestal virgins
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| Who were leaving for the coast
 | 
| And although my eyes were open
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| They might have just as well've been closed
 | 
| She said, 'I'm home on shore leave,'
 | 
| Though in truth we were at sea
 | 
| So I took her by the looking glass
 | 
| And forced her to agree
 | 
| Saying, 'You must be the mermaid
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| Who took Neptune for a ride.'
 | 
| But she smiled at me so sadly
 | 
| That my anger straightway died
 | 
| If music be the food of love
 | 
| Then laughter is its queen
 | 
| And likewise if behind is in front
 | 
| Then dirt in truth is clean
 | 
| My mouth by then like cardboard
 | 
| Seemed to slip straight through my head
 | 
| So we crash-dived straightway quickly
 | 
| And attacked the ocean bed |