| I come from south London I think I’m cool
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| I wear a cheap crombie and that’s about all
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| I go down the pub with all the lads
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| Their wearing their chains that they got from their dads
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| But all I got was a rotten cheap chain
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| My wife’s got in debt with the club book again
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| I’m a plastic gangster
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| They call me a crown and anchor
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| I asked one of my mates to get me some books
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| About the East End their gangs and their crooks
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| I bought a cheap car from one of the lads
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| He got it cheap from his car dealing dad
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| I’m in my new car, I’m driving it home
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| The next thing I know the engine has blown
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| I went down the West End, the local was drag
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| I had to pay a tenner to go with some bag
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| I took her home to her place I gave her some stick
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| The next thing I know the old bag was sick
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| I stay at home on Thursdays, minders on TV
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| I’m learning Cockney rhyming slang of to a tee
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| So when I go out on Fridays I know what to say
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| I wish I was like Arthur and get my own way. |