| Got a bottle full of mescal, couple of whores
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| A Colt .45 pistol tucked in my shorts
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| Drunk in the morn', I puked up my guts on the floor
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| Passed out, now I gotta go look for my horse
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| Yeah, I tied him up by the general store
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| Between the OK Corral and the federal court
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| I was in the Birdcage with a peach of a hand
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| Must of heard us all shootin', got spooked and he ran
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| Ike Clanton came walkin' in, clutchin' his flames
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| Got up in his face and told him that’s just my game
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| Play for blood, capisce?
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| Yeah, I’m way too drunk so I carry two guns punk, one for each
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| Pull the smoke wagon out, wave it and blaze
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| Guess I gotta make a few folks famous today
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| Oh well, that’s what it is when you live in this town
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| Whistle at me if you see my horse walkin' around
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| And say
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| Hey, Howdy Doody what’s new?
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| You might think I’m livin' life like a movie, it’s true
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| You can find me in a wild west grimy saloon
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| Gettin' live, drinkin' moonshine out of a boot
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| Yeah, so take a couple back
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| Kick your spurs in the dirt
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| Make a move and we hit the first person that smirk
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| One for the road before we tear the place to bits
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| I’m markin' my spot cowboy, you’re takin' a trip
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| He had a scar on his face and like to sip on the worm
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| And quit his job and his shirt filled with cigarette burns
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| What a jerk, he’s a slob, lipstick and a perm
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| That’s when heard «click click» and the chicken
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| So I grab my slingshot and duck right under the table
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| He untucked and started sprayin' rounds like Halo
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| Said, «Move and I’ll put your brain in your sleeve»
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| That’s when I pulled out my lucky nickel and aimed for the knees
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| Huh
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| Hit the floor and painfully screamed
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| Bullets hit the ceiling, now the place is rainin' debris
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| He couldn’t see so I kicked the gun right outta his hand
|
| Local hero does it again, hooray for the team
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| Singin'
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| Hey, Howdy Doody what’s new?
|
| You might think I’m livin' life like a movie, it’s true
|
| You can find me in a wild west grimy saloon
|
| Gettin' live, drinkin' moonshine out of a boot
|
| Yeah, so take a couple back
|
| Kick your spurs in the dirt
|
| Make a move and we hit the first person that smirk
|
| One for the road before we tear the place to bits
|
| I’m markin' my spot cowboy, you’re takin' a trip |