| You met her at a party on Saturday night
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| She was drinkin' advocaat
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| Her skin was smooth and her jeans were tight
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| You didn’t think she’d go that far
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| She mighta looked like a princess
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| But why’d you have to give her your address
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| Cos you ain’t safe when you get home
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| She’s gonna call you on the telephone
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| Hey boy that’s Balwyn callin'
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| Hey boy that’s Balwyn callin'
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| Hey boy that’s Balwyn callin'
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| Get on the phone and do a bit of stallin'
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| It was just too easy when you got to her flat
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| And she kicked off her platform shoes
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| And you played around like a cat and a rat
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| And now you’ve got the Balwyn blues
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| Well you thought she ould be a one nighter
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| But she wants to squeeze you tighter
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| Cos you ain’t safe when you get home
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| She’s gonna call you on the telephone
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| She sure knows when she’s got a good catch
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| And she just won’t let go
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| She’s been searchin' for the perfect match
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| Her ambition with your dough
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| A brick veneer prison is waitin' for you
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| But you just smile while she turns the screw
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| And you ain’t safe when you get home she
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| She’s gonna call you on the telephone
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| Hey boy that’s Balwyn calling X 3
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| Get off the phone and get out of Balwyn |