| I swear I feel so all alone, back down on my knees again
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| Hopin you can keep me strong, 'cause I can’t hardly sleep tonight
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| I took too many sleepin pills, I drunk too many Miller Lites
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| And I can feel the Reaper near, so please forgive me for my sins
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| I am just another man, sorry for the pain that I’ve caused
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| I know that you’ll understand, these demons’ll drive me — insane
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| I’ve been goin mad, rightly oughta blow out my brains
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| 'Cause I’m hurtin bad but I’m fightin… blast, on the other day
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| These problems got me usin more drugs, along with the other things
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| I’m slowly fading into my thoughts, (come against me, bring it on!)
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| And I’m driftin in and outta space, and I don’t believe I’m wakin up
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| With the alcohol, them drinks, drift me to another world
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| Where the sunshine stay shinin, I think I was finna url
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| Mom, can ya look at me? |
| This ain’t what I used to be
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| Tomorrow, I’ll be somebody else, 'cause I ain’t been me
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| I can’t seem to shake these, I’ll put that there on every day
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| Boy tryna figure me out, is like Lamar changing
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| But my childhood was fucked up — raised rowdy by a single moms
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| She told me my daddy didn’t give a fuck, she ain’t let him do his job
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| Seventh grade; |
| failing, and I don’t know my next of kin
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| These days in these fucked up ways, who the fuck are them?
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| My daddy had three other kids, but I ain’t never seen 'em
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| So, ain’t no sense in coming around now, you ain’t been here befo'
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| It’s sad but I ain’t feelin nuttin, my whole life’s been a fuckin maze
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| And when I tried to locate my siblings, they were gone away
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| Lost inside they other things, fucked me then, fucked me now
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| Quick to tell me «Show you some love» nigga show you Hell
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| Ain’t no love I’m feelin here, I ain’t never felt this vile
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| Momma — did you really love me, or was I just a child?
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| Said it, outside, I knew you seen it in my face
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| I wasn’t really happy here, but I was forced to lead the way
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| Copped me a Cheverolet, drift away to the other side just to think
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| If I get to see Heaven, I can thank you for the ride
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| And thank you for my other kids and even though
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| They mommas won’t admit that they can’t make it but bad
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| Low on the child support — always been bad boo, tryna make me out to be
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| The bad guy that I really ain’t, bitch so quick to hassle me
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| 'Cause I don’t see my kids enough, but I make the time to pick 'em up
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| But you find somethin to stick in my face — it ain’t me fuckin up
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| It’s bad enough, face to face, always wanna catch a case
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| So bad, they’ll try an get me they make me — and what takes the cake
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| Is the whole world is fuckin up, daddy know where the weankess at
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| And you spoke lies to ya old mans eyes, how could you sleep wit that?
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| Jepordize everything, just for searchin for larger life
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| Sacrificin the whole family, with no regards to Christ
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| Funny how people can take this shit for granted, right?
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| But then reality strikes, and changes things overnight
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| I thank the Lord for watchin over me, though I’m prone to doin wrong
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| I repent religiously, hopin that the weak get strong
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| When the heat get’s on
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| Hopin that the weak get strong, when the heat get’s on
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| Ya know, the street’s different, stays as it likes
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| Either, headin into a storm, ya in a storm
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| Or ya just got out of a storm, (yeah) think about it |