| And then it happened…
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| I only went and fucking did it
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| Used to be a dream but now I fucking live it
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| Weren’t even writing raps I was down and out about to fucking quit it
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| Lucky for me that I fucking didn’t
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| See lily came along when I was at my lowest
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| Selling wraps of coke not the raps I flow with
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| I made it and I owe to a chat I had with her,
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| Who knows where I’d be if that chat hadn’t occurred
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| Back with the bag, with the bag full of herb in it
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| Instead I got her on a track and I murdered it
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| My name started causing murmurs in the industry
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| But none of these labels would work with it until virgin did
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| Put my first single out and we earned a hit
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| That’s why I never go lippin off
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| Cuz hear me I know it must burn a bit
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| Just did a show and everybody knew the words to it
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| The day I risked everything for I couldn’t have given anything more all these
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| years have weighed heavy
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| But this is something that nothing could have readied me for
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| What you think all my problems are remedied cos' I get an applause, there not
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| Today I cried
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| And I don’t know why
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| But today I cried
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| And I don’t know why
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| My single went in at 3
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| My album went in at 2
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| For a debut not too shabby if I have to I make do
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| Finally some form of reward for the things I came through
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| But it’s different to the perfect picture people paint you
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| On the way up you might be a person people take to
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| Then you break through and the same people who rated you hate too
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| All of a sudden anything you may do may make news
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| And I’m sick to death of explaining what is ain’t true
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| Spend a day in my shoes and maybe you would feel the same too
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| Though I know I’ve got to make the most of it there will be no take 2
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| And I’m grateful I would hate to see 'em cos' I’m leaving my dream now
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| But I don’t sleep now
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| And all these hours awake are making me senile
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| Slept every time I’ve seen nan
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| Even people I’ve been round my whole life are looking at me like I’m a new me
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| now
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| They say I’ve changed but I just don’t see how
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| I’ve always lived my life taking corners that I can’t see round
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| Never knowing what it is I’m trying to seek out
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| But I’m even beginning to question me now
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| Today I cried
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| And I don’t know why
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| But today I cried
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| And I don’t know why
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| (Don't know why I cried)
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| I know it must seem mad to you
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| It’s mad to me
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| All I’ve done is what I’ve had to do
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| Been who I’ve had to be
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| But the path I’ve walked has been so gravely
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| It’s been a strain to remain humane amongst all this inhumanity
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| Thankfully I had nan who was a mum and a dad to me
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| You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family
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| Temporary happiness for me has been a fallacy
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| It’s so sad isn’t it
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| Stick your sympathy it means jack to me
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| Sick of hearing how happy I should be
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| I just don’t know how to be
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| I can no longer pretend
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| No more making out to be
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| Maybe all I needs a slap,
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| Someone to shake it out of me
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| Help me to spell my irrational thoughts think more rationally
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| Sick of being in the state of vanity
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| It’s agony
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| Am I torn or is it all some twisted form of vanity
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| Can it be I’m really just obsessed with myself, obsessive compulsive depressed,
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| my pressures reflecting my health
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| Taking care of my career but I’m neglecting myself
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| Rejected therapy no I just won’t accept any help
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| I pride myself on my honestly but in all honestly today I lied
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| I was asked how I was and I said I was fine, well I’m not
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| Today I cried
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| And I don’t know why
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| But today I cried
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| And I don’t know why |