Lyrics Post Mortem - El-P, Jean Grae, Akrobatik

Post Mortem

This is the last chapter, bombs hit who?
Crushed what?
Over there?
Oh, my God, oh, dear
I was, hmm, I think I was, huh, going somewhere
About to pay my fare, bright glare, not quite clear
Stare blind into the light of possibilities
Think I heard the screams of those in my proximity
Or had I started thinking wishfully?
Guided by fear
I’m semi-aware, please, is anybody out there?
It was a gentle fission kiss on my block
And hot light like a baby breathing sigh in her terrain
And now my name is merely last second of brain exist
Before the final flash
Where emotion and pretty details of the life I had passed
Now my warm night in Brooklyn is ash
Falling from the snot of loosies that I choked on
Around the corner from class
Before the moments when the moon can move fast
Another summer slowly growing with the friendships
That would end with a blast
Or how the hours could so blissfully lag
She slid her tongue between my lips and I gasped
Told my dawgs and they laughed
Now we’re combining our cash at last
A pack of smokes and a flask
I hope there’s liquor with a gas by the mask
Convert to atheism, denounce god, pronounce religion dead
Faith in nothing, trace my wrists with razors
I refuse to wait for the blaze to erase my spirit
Death, faced with it, run to it, not from it
Swallow all the pills in the medicine cabinet
Chase it with a bottle of one-fifty-one, hug mommy
Head outside to smash windows and trash my hotel lobby
Rape a cripple if the time allows
I find a kid to hem up, I wish I’d done more sinnin'
Get a strap-on, run up in some women
Lay in the middle of a highway, wait for pain to hit me
Steal all I can with people lootin', screamin', «Come and get me»
Find the nearest pawn shop, biggest gun, crowded street
Blow my brains to hell and gone and let the devil come for me
What’s the chances I’d be one of the last ones left alive to see this?
The Earthcrusher came before I could even conceive a fetus
But I did go from nothing to misunderstood elitist
Who tried to tell his people to rise instead of actin' like defeatists
But what good is that?
'Cause now we all goin' to hell
Like some kid playin' in his class, out talkin' before the bell
I died believing in righteousness, but I could have indulged more
'Cause giving in to temptation don’t seem that raw no more
I heard some airline offered flights into space
I shoulda took it to see earth before they mashed up the place
I thought I’d be alone when they finally came to get me
But nobody gotta miss me, 'cause they all comin' with me
Our horizon was accessorizing, need bred more need
Best believe it’s the equation of greed
I need a new car and thus new brakes, another tune-up with lube
Whatever’s put together shall be unscrewed
In times of famine, we made more food, food made more people
It’s all explained within the cycle of evil
Would I trade it all?
Cruisin' down the highway on a bright summer day
Gazing out a plane to see the earth from miles away
Watchin' the Patriots win the Super Bowl
Grabbing that fumble from Ricky Proehl
Or my stereo, providing me with rhythm and soul, I don’t know
All I know is I feel guilt for every single thing I’ve ever bought and sold
I shoulda been in more demonstrations
Planted bombs in corporations
Murdered CEO’s and cancelled TV shows
Burned billboards and torn posters, I coulda read more
Finally, I’ll get to meet this god they left us dead for
And it’s ill, it’s power to the form of a bill
For which people killed, lied, manipulated free will
Conscience will be their crucifix, the chopping block for poppycock
And I can feel our spirits drop upon these streets I oddly walk
Enough talk, here’s my last chance to cherish a thought
My flesh is fully melted and my stomach’s in a knot
So to my love, I hated to leave you alone, pardon my zone
Passion took me places and my life was a poem
Baby, I was on my way home, about to catch a flight
Our meeting has dissolved in radiation and light
Love you gave me made me shine
You’re gorgeous with a powerful mind
You lifted my spirits and strengthened my spine
I’m at peace with my life, 'cause knowin' you was divine
You made me see eternal beauty in a world that was dyin'
Now we’re all ground by the grind, out of luck and out of line
Out of signs, and now we’re out of time