| Take your Christmas lights down you lazy bum
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| I look across the street and i see your wreath
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| It reminds me of my old drunk uncle Pete
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| Take the lampshade off you’re not funny
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| Barf up some turkey from your drunk yummy tummy
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| Try to play poker but you can’t read the cards
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| Lying cheating stealing brains working too hard
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| Drunk uncle Pete can’t stand on two feet
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| He’s whiskey he’s a shot glass
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| He’s a forty ounce he’s family that’s right
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| Drunk Uncle Pete can’t find the door
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| He is mumbling and a stumbling
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| Drunk Uncle Pete
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| Christmas in the park getting drunk after dark
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| Fourth of July is a pause for the cause
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| Halloween spooky day Jack Daniel’s ok
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| Valentines chocolate nice and early times
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| St. Pats day that’s ok
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| First of June drunk again not a holiday
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| Lost a finger lost a limb
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| Wasn’t in the war let’s drink some more
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| Drunk uncle Pete can’t stand on two feet
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| He’s whiskey he’s a shot glass
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| He’s a forty ounce he’s family that’s right
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| 12 pack knock it back vicodin Ambien
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| Last call alcohol hurry up drink it all
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| Checks bouncing baby crying glasses empty liver dying
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| Fast women cheap cologne empty bottle all alone |