| Mary Anne and Wanda were the best of friends
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| All through their high school days
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| Both members of the 4H club
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| Both active in the FFA
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| After graduation Mary Anne went out looking
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| For a bright new world
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| Wanda looked all around this town
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| And all she found was Earl
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| Well it wasn’t two weeks
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| After she got married that
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| Wanda started getting abused
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| She put on dark glasses and long sleeved blouses
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| And make-up to cover a bruise
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| Well she finally got the nerve to file for divorce
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| She let the law take it from there
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| But Earl walked right through that restraining order
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| And put her in intensive care
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| Right away Mary Anne flew in from Atlanta
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| On a red eye midnight flight
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| She held Wanda’s hand as they
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| Worked out a plan
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| And it didn’t take long to decide
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| That Earl had to die
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| Goodbye Earl
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| You’re feeling weak
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| Why don’t you lay down
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| And sleep Earl?
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| The cops came to bring Earl in They searched the house
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| High and low
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| Then they tipped their hats
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| And said «Thank you ladies
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| If you hear from him let us know»
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| Well, the weeks went by and
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| Spring turned to summer
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| Summer faded into fall
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| And it turns out he was a missing person
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| Who nobody missed at all
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| So the girls bought some land
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| And a roadside stand
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| Out on highway 109
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| They sell Tennessee ham
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| And strawberry jam
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| And they don’t
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| Lose any sleep at night
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| Cause Earl had to die
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| Goodbye Earl
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| We need a break
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| Let’s go out to the lake, Earl
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| We’ll pack a lunch
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| And stuff you in the trunk, Earl
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| Well is that all right
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| Good, let’s go for a ride, Earl |