| Yo Yvette, there’s a lot of rumours goin' around
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| They’re so bad, baby you might have to skip town
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| See something’s smellin' fishy and they say it’s you
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| All I know is that you made it with the whole damn crew
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| They say you’re a man-eater during the full moon
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| Mascot of the senior boys' locker room
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| They said Yvette walked in, there wasn’t too much rap
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| Her reputation got bigger, and so did her gap
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| Cuz girl your momma shoulda taught you better
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| I’mma sit down and write you a long letter
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| I’m glad you ain’t my sister, then again if you was
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| I’d have to treat you like you was my distant cuz
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| I’m not a news reporter, I don’t mean to assume
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| What should I think? |
| I seen ya comin' out the men’s bathroom
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| You wasn’t in there alone, wasn’t usin' the phone
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| The door was locked for twenty minutes, all I heard was «Moan»
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| I don’t really know if the story is so
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| I can either ask Curly, or Larry or Moe
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| Or Earl, Shabazz, Lou, Mookie or Joe
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| Like Santa Claus said, you’re a ho-ho-ho
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| In every disco you say hello
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| Like you’re a little angel, but we all know
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| Since you was eleven you been actin' this way
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| You always got in bed when you wanted to play
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| You’re a freak, you think you’re Lady Godiva
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| Some freaks are live, but Yvette you’re liver
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| You’re a back-seat queen, a elevator pro
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| A high-powered body makes your Levis grow
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| See the stories I’ve heard, they could amaze
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| I heard she did it on a motorcycle back in the days
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| So calm down freak, get a G.E.D
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| That’s a General Education on Decency
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| One day you’ll see, and agree with me
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| Unless you’re gonna be a freak until you’re 93
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| For you there’s no fee, everything is free
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| This is from me to you, not you to me
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| Every night is your night, your leather pants are tight
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| You try to shake your butt with all your might
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| I don’t really wanna dis nobody
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| You might think I had a little too much Bacardi
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| But that’s not the problem, the problem’s Yvette
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| How bad can a girl’s reputation get?
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| See she’s the kinda girl all the homeboys met
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| If you’re desperate ask Yvette, cuz she’ll say «Bet»
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| B-Boys are hard on the boulevard
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| The Reverend at the church said you was barred
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| Homeboys on the block love you a lot
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| You’re a real famous freak whether you like it or not
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| So before you start walking and your beak starts squawkin'
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| Let me explain to you who is talkin'
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| I’m L.L. Cool J from around the way
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| You boogie down to my records almost every day
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| Go a hundred miles an hour when you’re standin' still
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| You’re faster than my Caddy when it’s goin' downhill
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| Won’t forget that day in the Y.M.C.A
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| The guy at the desk said it was OK
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| For you to come inside cuz he knew you’d stay
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| Greg G. and Garfield yelled «Hooray»
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette
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| Dear Yvette |