| Crazy Captain Gunboat Willie
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| Growled out his commands
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| And all the able seamen
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| Clicked their heels and swore
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| They would protect the noble ship
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| In peace-time and in war
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| And they danced a jig until the dawn
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| Sang a loyal sailors song
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| Drank a pot of steaming rum
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| Did all the things that loyal sailors do
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| Captain Bill expressed great glee
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| All the things that he had planned
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| Were made to go his way
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| All the fares he had collected and salted away
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| Made his lips turn in a smile
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| Just then Luke the rat from down below
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| Called to Gunboat Bill
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| He said
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| Listen to those madmen wail
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| They’ve been at sea for ninety days
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| Without the sight of land
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| No it doesn’t look so good to me
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| No it doesn’t look so good at all
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| The captain pondered what the rat had said
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| Until he could think of nothing more
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| Then he threw his crew into the foaming sea
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| At least a thousand miles from shore
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| And he danced a jig until the dawn
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| Sang a loyal captain’s song
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| Drank a pot of steaming rum
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| Did all the things that loyal captains do
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| The rat looked hard at Gunboat Bill
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| And he said in a serious style
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| As he leapt into the water
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| Don’t believe, no don’t believe
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| Don’t believe everything that you hear |