| The Angel of the Holy Grail saw Galahad come riding,
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| So he took the Holy Grail off the shelf.
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| And inside the Holy Chapel made for Holy Grail hiding,
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| The Angel could be seen to smile to himself.
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| «If you’re the Great Sir Galahad from now on,"said the Angel,
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| «May all angels call me blessed of my race.»
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| «If you’re not the Great Sir Galahad I warn you, keep on riding,
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| And if you are I pray you’ll let me see your face.»
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| Galahad removed his helmet, said, «Good Angel, look upon me,
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| Fear not for I bring tidings of great joy.»
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| «For long years the Grail you’ve guarded now you get to let me drink it,
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| How happy must be angels thus employed.»
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| «All the favours that you shower upon me, a simple angel,»
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| Said the Angel, «Your benevolence abounds.»
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| «Take your boots off, Great Sir Galahad; |
| for by your astounding beauty
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| Whatever ground you stand on turns to holy ground.»
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| Galahad took off his boots and he watched the ground quite closely
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| And the Angel smiled to himself again.
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| He said, «I can’t believe I’m asking, but Sir Galahad please tell me —
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| What is it that makes you want to go to Heaven?»
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| «In Heaven there’s no lamb chops, Queen Guineveres for hand jobs,
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| Marijuana, Kenny Rogers or ecstasy.»
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| «No pillaging, no rape, perhaps you’ve come by some mistake to me,
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| This seems more error than knight errantry.»
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| «Now what about the stable boys, I know you think they’re handsome,
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| And some of them they think you’re awful handsome too.»
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| «And sitting up in Heaven you’ll still think about them often,
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| When you’re an angel thinking’s all that you can do.»
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| At this Sir Galahad got angry, «Angel,"he said, «don't you tempt me,
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| I wish to go to Heaven and not to Hell.»
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| «So when stable boys look lonesome, when the women call me handsome,
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| I’ll hold my virtue very firmly by myself.»
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| «I guarantee you’ll hold it often,"said the Angel, «oh one more thing —
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| Before you drink the cup please take your armour off.»
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| «I gotta carry you to heaven and despite what you’d imagine
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| I have trouble bearing heavy things aloft.»
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| Sir Galahad stood naked and a pile of his armor,
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| His boots and helmet scattered all around.
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| His perfect lips they sipped the Grail, his perfect heart commenced to fail,
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| His perfect body fell upon the ground.
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| The Angel smoked a cigarette, when he was sure Galahad was dead
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| He picked all of his clothes up off the floor.
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| Then I put on his boots and armor, I laid his body on the altar,
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| Put his helmet on then I headed for the door. |