Lyrics West Side Story: Gee Officer Krupke - Johnny Green Orchestra, Johnny Green

West Side Story: Gee Officer Krupke

Dear kindly Sergeant Krupke
You gotta understand
It’s just our bringin' up-ke
That gets us out of hand
Our mothers all are junkies
Our fathers all are drunks
Golly Moses, naturally we’re punk!
Gee, Officer Krupke, we’re very upset;
We never had the love that ev’ry boy oughta get
We ain’t no delinquents
We’re misunderstood
Deep down inside us there is good!
There is good!
There is good, there is good
There is untapped good!
Like inside, the worst of us is good!
(That's a touchin' good story
Lemme tell it to the world!
Just tell it to the judge.)
Dear kindly Judge, your Honor
My parents treat me rough
With all their marijuana
They won’t give me a puff
They didn’t wanna have me
But somehow I was had
Leapin' lizards!
That’s why I’m so bad!
Officer Krupke, you’re really a square;
This boy don’t need a judge, he needs an analyst’s care!
It’s just his neurosis that oughta be cured
He’s psychologic’ly disturbed!
I’m disturbed!
We’re disturbed, we’re disturbed
We’re the most disturbed
Like we’re psychologic’ly disturbed
(Hear ye, Hear ye, in the opinion on this court, this child is depraved on
account of he ain’t had a normal home
Hey, I’m depraved because I’m deprived!
So take him to a headshrinker
Headshrinker, you!
Me?
You!)
My father is a bastard
My ma’s an S.O.B
My grandpa’s always plastered
My grandma pushes tea
My sister wears a mustache
My brother wears a dress
Goodness gracious, that’s why I’m a mess!
Yes!
Officer Krupke, you’re really a slob
This boy don’t need a doctor, just a good honest job
Society’s played him a terrible trick
And sociologic’ly he’s sick!
I am sick!
We are sick, we are sick
We are sick, sick, sick
Like we’re sociologically we’re sick!
(In my opinion, this child doesn’t need his head shrunk at all. Juvenile
delinquency is purely a social disease!
Hey, I got a social disease!
Just take him to the social worker!)
Dear kindly social worker
They say go make some dough
Like be a soda jerker
Which means I’ll be a schmo!
It’s not I’m anti-social
It’s just I’m anti-work
Gloryosky!
That’s why I’m a jerk!
(Officer Krupke, you’ve done it again
This boy don’t need a job, he needs a year in the pen
It ain’t just a question of misunderstood;
Deep down inside him, he’s no good!)
I’m no good!
We’re no good, we’re no good!
We’re no earthly good
Like the best of us is no damn good!
The trouble is he’s lazy
The trouble is he drinks
The trouble is he’s crazy
The trouble is he stinks
The trouble is he’s growing
The trouble is he’s grown
Krupke, we’ve got troubles of our own!
Gee, Officer Krupke
We’re down on our knees
'Cause no one wants a fellow with a social disease
Gee, Officer Krupke
What are we to do?
Gee, Officer Krupke
Fuck you!