| Gonna tell you a story, that you won’t believe
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| But I fell in love last Friday evening
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| With the girl I saw on a bar room TV screen
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| Well I was just getting ready to get my hat
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| When she caught my eye, and I put it back
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| And I ordered myself a couple of more shots and beers
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| The night that I fell in love with a roller derby queen
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| around and round, a round and round
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| The meanest hunk of woman that anybody ever seen
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| Down in the arena
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| She was 5 foot 6, two fifteen
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| A bleach blonde mama with a streak of mean
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| She knew how to knuckle and she knew how to scuffle and fight
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| And the roller derby program said
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| that she was built like a fridgerator with a head
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| Her fans called her Tuffy, but all her buddies called her Spike
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| The night that I fell in love with a roller derby queen
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| around and round, a round and round
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| The meanest hunk of woman that anybody ever seen
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| Down in the arena
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| Well I could not help it, but to fall in love
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| With this heavy duty woman I’ve been speaking of Things were kinda bad, until the day she skated into my life
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| Well she might be nasty, she might be fat
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| But I never met a person who would tell her that
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| She’s my bleach blonde bomber, my heavy handed Hackensack mama
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| The night that I fell in love with a roller derby queen
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| around and round, a round and round
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| The meanest hunk of woman that anybody ever seen
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| Down in the arena |