| Well it seems I’ve had a lifetime filled with misery
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| I remember how it all began
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| The doctor grabbed my feet, slapped me on the cheek
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| That’s what it takes to make a man
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| Even as a baby they were pinnin' things on me
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| Daddy called me mother’s little lamb
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| But you should have seen 'em rave
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| When I gave the dog a shave
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| That’s what it takes to make a man
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| They thought I was a genius, when I first went to school
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| Then I flunked my very first exam
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| And for all the books I’ve read
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| There' s just sawdust in my head
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| That’s what it takes to make a man
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| Well I finally finished highschool, tried some college too
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| Then I did a hitch with Uncle Sam
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| I fought the enemy, sergeants I’ll agree
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| That’s what it takes to make a man
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| Well I went back to my hometown
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| Where the mayor was my friend
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| Said he knew a job that I could lend
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| Well I got that job alright
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| Cleaned the streets up every night
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| That’s what it takes to make a man
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| Well I got a new position in a dry good store down town
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| Bought my gal a golden wedding band
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| But she up and fled the scene
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| When it turned her finger green
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| That’s what it takes to make a man
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| Oh yeah, that’s what it takes to make a man |