| Torn apart now,
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| I cannot have this combonation
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| And you should up your elixer
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| Torn apart now,
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| These are the choices we’ve made
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| Do I swallow, or walk away?
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| Yeah, most of my adult life I’ve been torn into two
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| If you love me, then I love you and this song is for you
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| It’s tight hard when you know what you said
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| And your shorty seein' you as an emotional wreck
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| The closer I get, it’s like the farther I feel
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| And my heart has turned into this heavy armor and steel
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| It’s hard to be real, hard to listen to the dumb shit
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| And I take a lot of pills 'cause it numbs shit
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| I wish I had another path to follow
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| Wish that I could be a man and learn to pass the bottle
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| A graphic novel, my future a box or an urn
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| Havin' dreams about death, but I’m not that concerned
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| And I’m diseased, through the seasons they turn
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| Watchin' leaves from the trees turn disease and they burn
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| I’m eager to learn, but I’m holdin' my breath
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| And everyday alive is just another closer to death
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| Yeah, I’ve been alive longer then I expected to be
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| And took care of everything that’s expected of me
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| Took care of my girl and my mother
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| I told her that I’m always here and I love her
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| I handle shit differently 'cause I’m grown now
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| And the truth is that I’d rather be alone now
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| I’d rather not have to deal with the day
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| And I hate when people ask me how I’m feelin' today
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| My brother Rasul, we had a beef and grudge
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| But we grew up together, cousin, so it’s peace and love
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| I wish all the best, I wish all the shine
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| I wish I didn’t wanna offer my thoughts with a nine
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| I’m thoughtful and kind, but I’m evil alas
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| But everything I love has turned to a tedious task
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| I feel that life a waiting game for people to pass
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| But nobody ever want you to see through the mask
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| Yeah, I don’t wanna be a burden to y’all
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| I just wanna know exactly what my purpose is for
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| I feel like nothin' I do is ever right
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| And that I’m actin' a fool another night
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| And I admit, I don’t take care of myself
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| So I do a lot of thinkin' and preparing myself
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| 'Cause the fact is my father died young and I might, too
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| And it ain’t any way to tell what I might do
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| I don’t wanna leave my mother behind
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| I don’t want for her to cry, because the struggle is mine
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| I don’t want for her to grind no more
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| I don’t want for her to work a 9-to-5 no more
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| I ain’t have to work a fuckin' 9-to-5 before
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| So I’m tryin' to get this money to provide for y’all
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| And if the shit ain’t work out and I’m suddenly gone
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| Just remember that the motherfuckin' love isn’t gone
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| Pazman |