| I don’t know if it was real or in a dream
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| Lately waking up I’m not sure where I’ve been
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| There was a table set for six and five were there
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| I stood outside and kept my eyes upon that empty chair
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| And there was steam on the windows from the kitchen
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| Laughter like a language I once spoke with ease
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| But I’m made mute by the virtue of decision
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| I choose most of your life goes on without me
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| Oh the fear I’ve known
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| That I might reap the praise of strangers and end up on my own
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| All I’ve sown was a song
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| But maybe I was wrong
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| I said to you the one gift which I’d adore
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| Unwrap a package of the next 10 years unfolding
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| But you told me if I had my way I’d be bored
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| Right then I knew I loved you best born of your scolding
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| When we last talked we were lying on our backs
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| Looking up at the sky through the ceiling
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| I used to lie like that alone out on the driveway
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| Trying to read the greek upon the stars the alphabet of healing
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| Oh I knew back then
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| It was a calling that said if joy then pain
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| The sound of the voice these years later is still the same
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| I am alone in a hotel room tonight
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| I squeeze the sky out but there’s not a star appears
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| Begin my studies with this paper and this pencil
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| And I’m working through the grammar of my fears
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| Mercy what I won’t give
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| To have the things which mean the most not to mean the things I miss
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| Unforgiving the choice still is
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| The language or the kiss |