| From high atop the magnificent Altoona Motor Hotel
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| Overlooking the twinkling lights of a magic city
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| The WBR Network proudly presents
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| The light and lilting sounds of your favorite music-makers
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| For your listening, dancing and ro-mancing pleasure
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| Good evening, America
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| This is Smilin' Eddie Fatootsie
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| Speaking to you from downtown Altoona
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| Where we’ve got toe-tapping, hand-clapping, finger-snapping, speed melodies
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| Designed to help you forget the cares of the day
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| Music from one of the world’s great motor hotels
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| That will soothe the savage beast
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| Warm the heart and tickle the toesies
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| Songs of love and laughter, joy and tears
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| Here while the lights of the city shine below
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| We proudly offer you the music of today and yesterday
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| Singable, danceable music
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| And now to get out program off and running here are some soft and subtle sounds
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| (Times have changed)
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| (And we’ve often rewound the clock)
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| (Since the Puritans got the shock)
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| (When they landed on Plymouth Rock)
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| (If today)
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| (Any shock they should try to stem)
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| ('Stead of landing on Plymouth Rock)
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| (Plymouth Rock would land on them) |