| Mr. Universe, can you help me please?
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| I’m only seven stone two
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| When I’m on the beach, the girls stay out of reach
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| They all want someone like you
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| You’ve got to help me, now please Mr. Universe
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| Don’t tell me that I’m just a hopeless case
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| Don’t let me down now, please Mr. Universe
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| I’m sick of getting sand thrown in my face
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| Mr. Universe, you know it’s getting worse
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| I need your seven-day plan
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| I’m thinner every day, before I waste away
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| I need a muscle-bound man
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| You’ve got to help me, now please Mr. Universe
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| Don’t tell me that I’m just a hopeless case
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| Don’t let me down now, please Mr. Universe
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| I’m sick of getting sand thrown in my face
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| You’ve got to help me, now please Mr. Universe
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| Don’t tell me that I’m just a hopeless case
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| Don’t let me down now, please Mr. Universe
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| I’m sick of getting sand thrown in my face |