| Candlelight and moonlight all around us
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| I look into your eyes
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| You hold my hand underneath the table
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| And I can’t disguise the way I feel
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| I could’ve wished a thousand wishes
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| For this night, I can’t believe
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| That it’s finally me and you, and you and me
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| Just us, and your friend Steve
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| Do-do-do do do-do do, Steve
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| Do-do-do do do-do do, leave!
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| What’s the deal with your friend Steve--
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| Oh, hey! |
| How’s it going?
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| You took me out for waffles and to the movies
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| I was hoping for romance
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| You even took me to the Mexican circus
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| I thought there was a chance we’d be alone
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| I could’ve wished a thousand wishes
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| For Steve to disappear
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| What the fuck’s your fucking problem?
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| Why’s he always here?
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| Do-do-do do do-do do, Steve
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| Do-do-do do do-do do, go away!
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| What’s the deal with your friend Steve--
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| Oh, hey! |
| How’s it going?
|
| It’s not that I don’t like your friend
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| But how many hours with him can you spend?
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| And it’s not that I don’t think he’s great
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| But it’s only you, only you I wanna fellate
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| Are you gay for Steve? |
| I think you may be
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| And that would be alright
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| But let a bitch know just what your steez is
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| So I know if I should shave tonight
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| I could’ve wished a thousand wishes
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| 'Cause I like to be with you
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| But if it’s always me and you and your friend Steve
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| There’s nothing I can…
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| Do-do-do do do-do do, Steve
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| Do-do-do do do-do do
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| Why don’t you just go be with your best friend
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| And boyfriend
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| Steve! |