| This is just a hypothetical story
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| Of someone, let’s just say it’s me
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| I’d gain acceptance for my murderous ways
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| By stalking a defenseless prey
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| If I were a killer, I’d smile just like the boy next door
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| If I were a killer, I’d say I do it for the poor
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| If I were a killer, You’d bring me victims more and more
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| If I were a killer!
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| Supreme Court would agree to hear my case
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| And find me innocent of crime
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| Holding public rallies to incite sympathy
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| Creative actuality
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| If I were a killer, I’d hide behind a doctor’s door
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| If I were a killer, I’d scrape you off my office floor |