Lyrics Uncle Bernie's Farm - Frank Zappa, The Mothers Of Invention

Uncle Bernie's Farm

There’s a bomb to blow yo mommy up A bomb for your daddy too (ouch.)
A baby doll that burps & pees
A case of airplane glue
A hungry plastic troll
To scarf yo buddy’s arm
A box of ugly plastic things marked:
Uncle Bernie’s Farm!
There’s a little plastic congress
There’s a nation you can buy (I'll take two.)
There’s a doll that looks like mommy
She’ll do anything but cry (I seen her.)
There’s a doll that looks like daddy
He’s a funny little man
Push a button & ask for money
There’s a dollar in his hand (check his wallet.)
We gotta send Santa Claus back to the Rescue Mission
Christmas don’t make it no more
Don’t you know that murder & destruction
Scream the toys in every store (think this’ll sell in New York?)
There’s a man who runs the country
There’s a man who tried to think
And they’re all made out of plastic
When they melt they start to stink
There’s a book with smiling children
Nearly dead with Christmas joys!
And smiling in his office
Is the creep who makes the toys.
..
FZ: We got this car: when it hits the wall you see the guy dying.
..
got the little plastic puddles of blood.
.. by the car
I’M DREAMING.
..
Ray: He has intestines.
.. he has plastic intestines you can
stuff back into his stomach.
..
FZ: There’s this other thing, I’ve got bombs.
I’ve got rockets, I’ve got a.
..
I’ve got a stilson wrench & plastic brass knuckles.
..
Ray: And it comes with a tape recorder with sound effects.
..
FZ: We got a '39 Chevy.
..