| Mother, Father, I’m here in the zoo
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| I can’t come home 'cause I’ve grown up too soon
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| I got my sentence
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| I got my command
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| They said they’d make me major if I met all their demands
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| I could be a corporal into corporal punishment
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| Or the general manager of a large establishment
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| They pat some good boys on the back and put some to the rod
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| But I never thought they’d put me in the…
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| Goon squad
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| They’ve come to look you over and they’re giving you the eye
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| Goon squad
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| They want you to come out to play
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| You’d better say goodbye
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| Some grow up just like their dads
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| And some grow up too tall
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| Some go drinking with the lads
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| Some don’t grow up at all
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| You must find the proper place for everything you see
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| But you’ll never get to make a lampshade out of me
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| I could join a chain of males or be the missing link
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| Looking for a lucky girl to put me in the pink
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| They pat some good boys on the back and put some to the rod
|
| But I never thought they’d put me in the…
|
| Goon squad
|
| They’ve come to look you over and they’re giving you the eye
|
| Goon squad
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| They want you to come out to play
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| You’d better say goodbye
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| Mother, Father, I’m doing so well
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| I’m making such progress now that you can hardly tell
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| I fit in a little dedication with one eye on the clock
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| They caught you under medication
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| You could be in for a shock
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| Thinking up the alibis that everyone’s forgotten
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| Just another mummy’s boy gone to rotten
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| They pat some good boys on the back and put some to the rod
|
| But I never thought they’d put me in the…
|
| Goon squad
|
| They’ve come to look you over and they’re giving you the eye
|
| Goon squad
|
| They want you to come out to play
|
| You’d better say goodbye |