| Lost the remote, gotta change it by hand
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| Can’t find the time, fell behind on plans
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| Ring fell in the drain, forced to buy a new one
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| Lost the plot of the thing, gotta start at the top
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| Can’t find a handhold, fell to the ground
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| Life in the toilet, can i buy a new one?
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| Bought a pellet gun, purchased a mask
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| Arrived at the bank, with an empty bag
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| Asked politely, «please lay on your fat bellies.»
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| Waved the gun, people did what I said
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| Handed me cash, and i was on my way
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| Someone screamed, but i said, «shhhh, please don’t.»
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| Then I rode my bike home
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| Made it through the door, but my roommate saw
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| Told him I’m trying out for a role
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| «Desperate man 1» and I think I got the part |