| John come home all in a wonder,
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| Rattled at the door just like thunder.
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| «Who is that?"Mister Hendley cried,
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| «It is my husband! |
| You must hide!»
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| She held the door till old man Hendley
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| Jumping and jerking went up the chimney.
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| John come in, looked all around,
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| But not a soul could be found.
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| John sat down by the fireside weeping,
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| Up the chimney he got to peeping.
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| There he saw the poor old soul
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| Sittin' a-straddle of the pot-rack pole.
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| John built on a rousing fire
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| Just to suit his own desire.
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| His wife called out with a free good will,
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| «Don't do that, for the man you’ll kill!»
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| John reached up and down he fetched him
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| Like a racoon dog he catched him.
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| He blacked his eyes and then he did better:
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| He kicked him out upon his setter.
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| His wife she crawled in under the bed,
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| He pulled her out by the hair of the head.
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| «When I’m gone, remember this!»
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| And he kicked her where the kicking is best.
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| The law came down and John went up,
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| He didn’t have the chance of a yellow pup,
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| Sent him down to the old chain gang
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| For beating his wife, the dear little thing.
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| When he got off, he went back to court,
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| His wife she got him for non-support.
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| John didn’t worry and John didn’t cry
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| But when he got close, he socked her in the eye.
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| Took John back to the old town jail
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| His wife she come and paid his bail.
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| Won’t be long till he’ll be loose --
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| I could tell more about it but there ain’t no use. |