| Well, I was feeling like hell and I was not getting well
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| So I went in for a physical check
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| And when I got to the doc, it was a hell of a shock
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| He said, «Boy, you’re a physical wreck»
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| He said,"Your livers all swollen
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| And your stomach’s got a hole in it
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| From drinking too much for too long
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| And that’s a good indication, you got bad circulation
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| 'Cause your blood pressure’s almost gone"
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| «And you got no reflexes in your solar plexus
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| When I tap you on the top of your knee
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| And your pulse ain’t steady and your lungs
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| Are ready to collapse anytime you breath»
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| «And at the rate you’re going all the symptoms showing
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| Boy, you’ll never live to get old
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| So I came up with a plan to make you healthy again
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| But, boy, you’ve got to do what you’re told»
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| «If you dig it, don’t do it and if you like it better leave it alone
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| And if it’s too much fun that ought to clue you, son
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| That you’re probably doing something that’s wrong»
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| And if it feels good to you, don’t let it fool you
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| 'Cause you’re playing in the danger zone"
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| I kept waiting and waiting for the doctor to finish
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| But he kept going on and on
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| He told me cut out the booze and put those muscles in use
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| And don’t be smoking no cigarettes
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| And you know love with a stranger might be fun
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| But it’s just like Russian Roulette
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| Get the grease out your diet, boil it
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| Don’t fry it and don’t you eat no more barbecue
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| You better get you a pen I ain’t gonna tell you again
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| 'Cause there’s a whole lot more you gotta' do
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| If you dig it, don’t do it and if you like it better leave it alone
|
| And if it’s too much fun that ought to clue you, son
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| That you’re probably doing something that’s wrong"
|
| And if it feels good to you, don’t let it fool you
|
| 'Cause you’re playing in the danger zone"
|
| I kept waiting and waiting for the doctor to finish
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| But he kept going on and on
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| He told me cut out the meat and don’t be crampin' your feet
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| And then he pointed toward Italian shoes
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| And he said, «Boy, look here you’re gonna damage your ear
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| Listening to loud rock and rhythm and blues
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| And if a rabbit won’t eat it brother you don’t need it
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| That’s the rules of your new menu
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| I wouldn’t tell you no lie 'cause you will certainly die
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| And there’s a whole lot more you gotta do
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| If you dig it, don’t do it and if you like it better leave it alone
|
| And if it’s too much fun that ought to clue you, son
|
| That you’re probably doing something that’s wrong"
|
| And if it feels good to you, don’t let it fool you
|
| 'Cause you’re playing in the danger zone"
|
| I kept waiting and waiting for the doctor to finish
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| But he kept going on and on
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| You better stand up straight, you better lose some weight
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| Your posture’s a terrible disgrace
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| You ought to suck in your gut, you need to pull in your butt
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| And there’s whole lot more you gotta do |