| Well there’s women in the city that make me feel shitty
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| And there’s some that make me pack a wad
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| But the ones that are fine, oh will never be mine
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| They won’t even give me the time of day
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| I ain’t got no money, I ain’t got no home
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| I gotta find me a bim to live with tonight
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| Sport’n a woody, when you’re walkin' by
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| Sport’n a woody, when you’re titties fly
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| Sport’n a woody, rippin' my fly
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| Sport’n a woody, till the day I die yeah
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| Well my woody gets big when you’re takin' a swig
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| And your drink’s makin' you loosen up
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| Starts a-talkin' to me, well look down and you’ll see
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| What the hell I been talkin' about
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| Don’t know what I’m gonna do, can’t stop lookin' at you
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| 'Cause you’re sure lookin' nice to me
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| Well I wish you were sedated
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| So I could at least penetrate you
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| For an hour, maybe three yeah
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| I can’t go downtown much, all the working girl butts
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| Ya know they really make my woody happy
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| But in the night clubs and such
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| And all the corner sluts
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| Might just make my waistband go snappy!
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| Sport’n a woody
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| Sport’n a woody
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| Sport’n a woody
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| Sport’n a woody, for the rest of my life I’ll be… |