| When I was a small boy
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| Here in London town
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| Seasons snow was falling on the ground
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| All the friends and family
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| Here on Christmas Eve
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| Gather round to dress
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| The Christmas tree
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| But daddy’s down at the pub
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| Full of Christmas cheer
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| Probably won’t come home
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| Until next year
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| Oh the Christmas bells are ringing
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| And the carolers are singing
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| But Daddy, he don’t hear 'em
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| He’s yellin' at the Christmas tree
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| Santa’s balls are jingling
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| Mommy’s hips a-wiggling
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| But Daddy, he don’t hear 'em
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| He’s yellin, he’s yellin'
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| At the Christmas tree
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| All right now yeah…
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| Uncle is a sports fan
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| Granny likes a joke
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| But no one laughs when
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| Daddy’s stumbles home
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| But he don’t fall asleep
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| Wah! |
| The night was getting black
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| You see, oh God,
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| Dad had too much Jack
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| Oh Lord!
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| Every year is the same old thing
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| Like Rudolph’s red nose
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| Telling this story will never get old
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| Well alright now yeah…
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| Well alright now…
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| Yellin' at the Christmas tree
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| Santa came down the chimney
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| But then he ran upstairs
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| Jumped in bed with Mommy
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| She didn’t care
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| Across the room went the fruitcakes
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| Ah, the wreath came off the door
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| If these are holidays I can take no more
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| Every year it’s the same old thing
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| Like Rudolph’s red nose
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| Hearing this story will never get old
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| Santa’s balls are jingling
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| Mommy’s hips a-wiggling
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| But Daddy, he don’t hear 'em
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| He’s yellin'
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| He’s yellin' at the Christmas tree
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| Well alright now yeah…
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| He’s yellin' at the Christmas tree
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| He’s yellin' at the Christmas tree
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| He’s yellin' at the Christmas tree
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| He’s sleeping it the Christmas tree |