Lyrics Crazy ABC's - Barenaked Ladies

Crazy ABC's

Hey Steve
Hey Ed.
That sounds nice, what is it?
Thank you, it’s a, it’s an alphabet song I’m working on
Oh great, a whole new alphabet, I just learned the old one
«A» is for aisle, «B» is for bdellium, «C» is for czar
And if you see him would you mind telling him?
Okay, hang on a second, yeah aisle, bdellium?
Yeah, aisle like a, like a theater
Alright, okay and bdellium?
Bdellium, it’s a gum like tree resin, it starts with a silent B
And then czar?
Yeah, it’s uh like a Russian czar
You know everybody knows apple, ball and cat
I wanted to get into some, you know some stranger words
Right, I see what you’re doing
«D» is for djinn, «E» for Euphrates
«F» is for fohn, but not like when I call the ladies
I thought phone started with a «P» like a «Ph»
No, it’s F-O-H-N, it’s a, it’s a kind of wind
Yeah, I know what you mean by wind
«G» for gnarly, «I» for irk, «H» is for hour
«J» for jalapeño, good in either corn or flour
…tortillas
Nice rhyme
«K» is for knick knack, «L» is for llama
Pramma, llama, ding, what’s so strange about llama?
Llama, it starts with two «L"'s
What’s the second one for?
No idea
I know.
Loser
«M» for mnemonic, «N» is for ndomo, «O» is for Ouija board
«P» for pneumonia, pterodactyl and psychosis, «Q» is for qat
Okay, «Q» … qat?
What?
Yeah, it’s uh Q-A-T, it’s an evergreen shrub
It’s a perfect scrabble word because it’s a «Q» with no «U»
There’s not many of those
You have too much time on your hands
«R» is for argyle
No it isn’t
Okay, you’re right, I couldn’t find a good «R» word
«S» is for Saar, a lovely German river
«T» for tsunami, a wave that makes me quiver
«U» is for urn, but not like earning money
«V» for vraisemblance from French and therefore kind of funny
«W» for wren, wrinkly and who
«X» is for Xian, an ancient Chinese city, true
Ancient Chinese city, huh?
My guitar player, some hotshot
«Y» is for yiperite, a very nasty gas
And Zed’s the final letter and by final I mean last
Okay, when you say Zed for the benefit of our American friends
You really mean «Zee», right?
No, I mean Zed, like, like Zed Zed Top
Zed Zed Top?
Yeah, you know the guys with the big long beards
Well, except the guy, uh, whose name is Beard, he has a mustache
I always thought that was interesting
You done with the alphabet?
No, extra letters I haven’t heard of?
I think so
This was a great help, I think
With the contribution you made to world literacy
Well, I’m just saying, kids I’m just saying
Think outside the box a little bit
Yeah, that’s box with an «R»
Yeah, well, no balks with a B-A-L-K-S like a pitcher
Ah, as opposed to B-A-C-H-S
Right, think outside the Bachs, get into some Rochmaninov
That’s Rochmaninov with a «W»