| When the college professor has no class
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| And the quarterback would rather pass
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| And the pump jockey complains of gas
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| It’s hard times, hard times
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| When the taxi driver he can’t hack it
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| And the tennis player can’t stand the racket
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| When allies refuse to pack it, it’s hard times
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| Hard times, hard times, real hard times
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| When the elevator can’t find the floor
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| And the doorman he can’t find the door
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| When they give to the rich what they take from the poor, it’s hard times
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| Seems your money’s gone before it’s spent
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| If you’re not busted then you’re badly bent
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| To give it away doesn’t make any sense, it’s hard times
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| Hard times, hard times, real hard times, hard times
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| Now grandma forgets how to knit
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| And the wise man has lost his wit
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| And my tailor feels unfit, it’s hard times, hard times
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| When the fashion model’s lost her poise
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| And Santa Clause smashes all the toys
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| When boys could be girls, and girls could be boys, it’s hard times
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| Hard times, hard times, real hard times, hard times
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| When the clock on the wall’s got no time for jokes
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| And Kreskin says it’s all a hoax
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| When the Surgeon General chain smokes, it’s hard times
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| When the truck driver don’t wanna truck
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| And the hockey player won’t touch the puck
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| And the rock musician don’t wanna fool around, it’s hard times
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| Hard times, hard times, real hard times
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| Harder times, hard times
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| I was talking to this lady the other day and she was telling me… |