| The Washington Post is my newspaper
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| The Washington Post the one to read, the Washington Post is all you need
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| The Washington Post is my view shaper
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| The Washington Post, The Washington Post, The Washington Post, the Post,
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| the Post
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| So if you? |
| re after the latest news, The Washington Post will give you the most
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| And if you? |
| re craving the latest views, The Washington Post is the one you need,
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| sir!
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| So if you are after the latest news, The Washington Post will give you the most
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| And if you? |
| re craving the latest views, The Washington Post is the one to read,
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| sir!
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| They? |
| ve got the comics and the crossword puzzles, too
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| They? |
| ve got the help wanted pages and want ads there
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| So if you think you? |
| ll ever find a better paper in the world
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| You better go to church and say a prayer (and say a prayer)
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| They? |
| ve got photographers and correspondents too
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| They? |
| ve got a big editorial staff as well
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| So if you think you? |
| ll ever find a better paper in the world
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| My friend then you can always go to Hell, (you go to hell, you go to hell you
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| go to hell
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| You go to hell you go to hell then you can always go to hell, sir!
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| You might be wondering about their op-ed page
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| And if they? |
| ll print what you offer as timeless prose?
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| Well, it? |
| s agreed at least they? |
| ll read whatever screed you? |
| ve scribbled
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| Right before they tell you, ?Stick it up your nose?! |
| (yes up your nose,
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| yes up your nose
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| Yes up your nose, before they tell you, you can stick it up your nose, sir!
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| Reporters write their stories down by hand sometimes
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| They use computers and typewriter keyboards, too
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| So if you think you? |
| ll ever find a better paper anywhere
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| Then you can stick it up your old wazoo, up your wazoo, Hey! |