| My nigga, do you have a gas can?
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| (The fuck I’m gonna do with a gas can, nah, nigga what?)
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| It’s just been a long ass day, man
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| All I need is a gas can
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| (Na, try down across the street, I think that nigga keep one, I don’t know)
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| I’m finna head over there and I’mma be right back
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| (Fuck what you doing, man?
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| Knocking on the door extra hard and shit like you just stressed out or
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| something)
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| My nigga, I don’t even know where to begin, dog
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| (What happened, man?)
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| Look, I woke up this morning feeling fucked up
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| What else is new? |
| Like God be like, «To hell with you»
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| To tell the truth, I ain’t been to church in like three or fo'
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| Years, not months, have mercy on my soul
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| Threw on the wife-beater, put a fitted on my skull
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| Took a long ass piss, grabbed my shades and hit the door
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| I had half a blunt left from last night
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| I lit that bitch up like a lightbulb and got right
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| Started to orchestrate my day like a maestro
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| I should hit the lab, I got verses like the Bible
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| I heard hip hop need revival
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| It’s been camouflaged like the mascot for Geico
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| In that bullshit, I took another pull quick
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| My mind flooded like a fucking swimming pool is
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| Went back in the house, raided my mom’s refrigerator
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| But everybody’s on a diet and my stomach ain’t quiet
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| I said, «Fuck it», hit the shower like a jackpot
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| The weed got my teeth off-white like crack rock
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| Toothbrush from the 99 cent store
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| I got a million dollar smile, it don’t make sense though
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| Threw on my army fatigue shorts and a T that say «Peace Not War»
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| Now everybody eyeing me
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| I don’t know if I need an iron or it’s the irony
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| And by the way, I’m at the gas station now
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| But not to get gas, just another black and mild
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| Shit this half a half a tank gon' have to last until Monday
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| And it’s Tuesday, the bitches still want me like a bouquet
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| I hit my nigga Agent, he want to roll up two Ls like Cool J
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| I’m like, «Alright, cool, Jay»
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| But I gotta be at work by 3, it’s midday
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| I can’t go in smelling like weed, he said, «Okay»
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| Stop by the cheap tobacco store, two swishers for a dollar
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| And when he meet me, we finna get high, like a greeting
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| He told me, «Drop five», I said, «I got you next time»
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| Long story short, I bumped my head on cloud nine
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| And I’m chilly chill even when it’s hot outside
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| Rode to the studio rather blasted
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| I spit like a dragon that’ll leave a fan flabbergasted
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| That’s when my gas and my check engine light
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| Clicked on at the same exact time I signal right
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| And that ain’t right, I got shit to do today
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| Cause any day you could be attending my eulogy
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| Got to the studio when everybody left
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| I saw a note that read, «We went to go work on Detox with Weezy F»
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| My fault nigga, I actually came up with the idea to write that
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| (You laughin' but that shit ain’t funny man)
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| It was funny at first but
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| A day in the life
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| Of mister soul brother number deuce
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| Damn he nice
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| I’m thinking if you only knew
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| You could fuck with it or middle fingers up to your whole crew
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| Tell 'em the regular nigga said it and that it
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| A day in the life
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| Of mister soul brother number deuce
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| Damn he nice
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| I’m thinking if you only knew
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| You could fuck with it or middle fingers up to your whole crew
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| Now it’s 2:58 and I’m running late for work
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| Running meanin' stuck in traffic cause the Home Depot is finna jerk
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| I been in the same position before
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| Manager said it better be my last time, but it won’t
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| I clocked in around 3:10 and I’m wishing I didn’t
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| Cause UPS just brought in this big ass shipment
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| And for those that don’t know, I work at a record store
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| And I make hot records (That's a sick ass gimmick)
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| Finished the inventory then I logged on Myspace
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| I had one download and 'bout 16 plays
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| 5 friend requests from sucka MCs making a name
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| I signed out and had to question my aim (You weak nigga, that’s all)
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| This old-timer walked in and we got to talking about Eric B and Rakim
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| And the perm on Al Sharpton
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| Osama bin Laden, Obama in the office
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| And he looked me in my face and said I’m destined for fame
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| Told him I do music, he like, «Whatever you do, do it
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| And don’t blink, the moment you close your eyes, you’ll lose it» |
| Word to wise, that was some great advice
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| That I took like I stole it, then my head sort of swollen
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| I guess that’s why I shits on 'em like a cleansed colon
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| Told the rest of the shoppers we finna be closing
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| I locked up like Akon and hit the street
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| It’s 8 PM, and I ain’t had shit to eat
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| All day, KFC, snackers a dollar each
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| Bar-b-que and nacho cheese
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| I bought 4, ate 3, gave one to Top Dawg
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| I would’ve had one for Punch but he moved like a sloth
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| I’m back at the studio now if I lost ya
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| And everything’s straight, you can thank great posture
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| Hit my lil momma up cause I’m trying to cut
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| But she on the rag and I don’t mean a bandanna
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| She told me come through, she gave me head like Rihanna
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| And I deserve a standing ovation for my swagger
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| Chuck the deuce, headed for the car to finish off the night right
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| But it wouldn’t start
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| Laugh it up nigga, laugh it up man
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| Shit ain’t funny man, that’s why I need that damn gas can
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| (Gas, nigga, you gotta put 5 dollars not 3 in)
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| Shit nigga I ain’t got 5 dollars to put in!
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| (That'll get you one gallon, nigga)
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| Whatever man, bullshit dog, keep laughin'
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| (Tryin' to save that extra dollar for that menu
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| For the McDonalds menu nigga ain’t gotta cut all the time
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| Nigga you gotta put the whole 5 in it)
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| You gon' shoot me 5 or what? |
| Fuckin' bastard
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| (I know you’re on a budget, but damn) |