| Came to the world at a time when it was in need of a villain
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| An asshole, that role I think I succeeded fulfillin'
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| But don’t think I ever stopped
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| To think that I was speakin' to children
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| Everything was happenin' so fast
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| It was like I blinked—sold three million
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| Then it all went blank, all I remember is feelin' ridiculous
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| ‘Cause I was gettin' sick of this feelin'
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| Like I’m always under attack, man
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| I could have stacked my shit list to the ceilin'
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| Women dishin' but really thinkin': «If anyone ever talks to one of my little
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| girls like this I would kill him.»
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| Guess I’m a little bit of a hypocrite when I’m rippin' shit
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| But since when did this many people ever give a shit
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| What I had to say? |
| It’s just my opinion
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| If it contradicts how I’m livin', put a dick in your rear end
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| That’s why every time you mentioned a lyric
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| I thanked you for it, for drawin' more attention toward it
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| ‘Cause it gave me an enormous platform
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| I’m flattered you thought I was that important
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| But you can’t ignore the fact that I fought for the respect
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| And battled for it, mad awards, had GLAAD annoyed
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| Atta-boy, they told me to slow down, I’d just zone out
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| Good luck tryin' to convince a blonde
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| It’s like tellin' Gwen Stefani she sold out
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| ‘Cause I was tryna leave no doubt
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| In anyone’s mind, one day I’d go down in history
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| Think they know now because everybody knows
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| Everybody knows
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| That you’re just an asshole
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| Everywhere that you go
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| People wanna go home, everyone knows
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| Everybody knows
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| So don’t pretend to be nice
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| There’s no place you can hide
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| You are just an asshole
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| Everyone knows, everyone knows
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| Thanks for the support, asshole! |
| *scratch*
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| Thanks for the support, asshole!
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| Quit actin' salty! |
| I was countin' on you to count me out
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| Ask Asher Roth when he roundabout
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| Dissed me to shout me out
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| Thought I was history, well goddamn, honky
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| That compliment’s like backhandin' a donkey
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| Good way to get your ass socked in the mouth
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| Nah, I’m off him
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| But what the fuck’s all this trash-talkin' about?
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| The fight was fixed, I’m back and you can’t stop me
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| You knocked me down, I went down for the count
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| I fell, but the fans caught me, and now
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| You’re gonna have to beat the fuckin' pants off me
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| To take my belt—word to Pacquiao
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| Momma said there ain’t nothin' else to talk about
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| Better go in that ring and knock 'em out
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| Or you better not come out
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| It’s poetry in motion
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| Like Freddie Roach when he’s quotin' Shakespeare
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| So what if insults are revoltin'?
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| Even Helen Keller knows life stinks
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| You think it’s a joke 'til you’re bullet-riddled
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| But you should give little shit what I think
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| This whole world is a mess
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| Gotta have a goddamn vest on your chest
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| And a Glock just to go watch Batman
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| Who needs to test a testicles? |
| Not that man
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| Half of you don’t got the guts, intestinal blockage
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| Rest of you got lap bands
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| Stuck to this motto 'fore they put bath salts
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| And all those water bottles in Colorado, so get lost, Waldo
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| My soul’s escapin' through this asshole that is gapin'
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| A black hole and I’m swallowin' this track whole
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| Better pack toilet paper, but I’m takin' no crap, ho
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| Here I go down the Bat Pole
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| And I’m changin' back into that old maniac
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| In fact, there they go tryna dip out the back door retreatin'
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| ‘Cause everybody knows
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| Everybody knows
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| That you’re just an asshole
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| Everywhere that you go
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| People wanna go home, everyone knows
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| Everybody knows
|
| So don’t pretend to be nice
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| There’s no place you can hide
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| You are just an asshole
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| Everyone knows, everyone knows
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| Holy mackerel! |
| I’m the biggest jerk on the planet Earth
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| I smacked a girl off the mechanical bull at a tractor pull
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| For thinkin' we had some magnetic pull
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| Then screamed, «ICP in this bitch! |
| How do fuckin' magnets work?»
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| ‘Cause you’re attractive, but we ain’t attractable
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| Hate to be dramatical, but I’m not romantical
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| I’m makin' up words so you can understandable, it’s tragical
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| Thinkin' some magical shit’s gonna happen, that ain’t practical
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| You crackin' a joke, it’s laughable
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| ‘Cause me and love’s like a bad combination
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| I keep them feelings locked in a vault
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| So it’s safe to say I’m uncrackable |
| My heart is truly guarded, full body armor
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| Bitch, you just need a helmet
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| ‘Cause if you think you’re special, you’re retarded
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| Thinkin' you’re one of a kind like you got some platinum vagina
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| You’re a train wreck, I got a one-track mind
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| Shorty, you’re fine, but you sort of remind me of a 49er
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| ‘Cause you been a gold digger since you was a minor
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| Been tryna hunt me down like a dog
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| ‘Cause you’re on my ass but you can’t get a cent
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| ‘Cause all of my spare time is spent
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| On my nose in this binder, so don’t bother tryin'
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| Only women that I love are my daughters
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| But sometimes I rhyme and it sounds like I forget I’m a father
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| And I push it farther
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| So, Father, forgive me if I forget to draw the line
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| It’s apparent I shouldn’t have been a parent
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| I’ll never grow up, so to hell with your parents
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| And motherfuck father time
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| It ain’t never gonna stop, a pessimist
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| Who transformed to an optimist in his prime
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| So even if I’m half-dead, I’m half-alive
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| Poured my half-empty glass in a cup
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| Now my cup has runneth over
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| And I’m 'bout to set it on you like a mothafuckin' coaster
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| I’m goin' back to what got me here
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| Yeah, cocky, and can’t knock bein' rude off, so fear not, my dear
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| And dry up your teardrops, I’m here
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| White America’s mirror, so don’t feel awkward or weird
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| If you stare at me and see yourself because you’re one too
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| Shouldn’t be a shock, because everybody knows
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| Everybody knows
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| That you’re just an asshole
|
| Everywhere that you go
|
| People wanna go home, everyone knows
|
| Everybody knows
|
| So don’t pretend to be nice
|
| There’s no place you can hide
|
| You are just an asshole
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| Everyone knows, everyone knows |