| Lady, I have been told that you only date nice guys
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| Well, if that’s how you judge a lover’s worth
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| Your ass just hit pay dirt
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| I’m the most sensitive man on God’s green Earth
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| Here’s a rose bouquet
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| I also baked you some fresh creme brûlée
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| Now mount this stallion and we shall ride
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| While also flying kites
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| Make love inside a rainbow through the night
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| Then after sex I’ll cry, cry
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| And also before sex I’ll cry, cry
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| Girl, you know how I feel about you
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| It’s like you’re a fossil sample
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| And I’m an impatient paleontologist
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| Cause I want to date you badly
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| Watch a film with me
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| I love boring romantic comedies
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| Hop in my carriage, this is like your dream
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| Any movie we see can be a drive-in movie
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| If we build up enough speed
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| Now it’s almost dawn
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| I can communicate with newborn fawns
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| Now they’ll perform an ancient forest dance
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| That will melt off your pants
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| Take my junk by the hand, this is romance
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| And during sex
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| I’ll cry
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| Thinking about sex
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| Makes me cry
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| Even when I use a sextant I cry
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| They measure angles
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| Cry…
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| Sorry, was that too sensitive for you?
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| Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine
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| I’ll just be over here, thinking about a duckling
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| Riding on the back of a puppy
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| Also the duckling is wearing a tiny cowboy hat
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| Slightly tilted |